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Purple Lashes and the World’s Ugliest Pizza Dough Crust

April 11th, 2018 by Karen 24 Comments

urban decay double team mascara vice
Pizza and purple lashes

Purple lashes and pizza are NOT mutually exclusive.

urban decay double team vice
Statistics flashbacks! And Urban Decay Double Team Mascara. And UD 24/7 Glide-On Eye Pencil in Vice. Both of which I’m wearing in these pics.

You learn something new every day!

I finally made pizza ? for the very first time using raw pizza dough, which I got from Trader Joe’s, and lemme tell ya — I’m not going to be winning any Beautiful Pizzas of Instagram Awards anytime soon.

My goodness, that’s a hideous crust…

finished pizza
Let’s just say that it wasn’t sculpted by Michelangelo… It was damn tasty though.

Allegedly, El Hub knows how to make pizza dough from scratch (allegedly). Although I’ve yet to witness this phenomenon in person, he still poked fun at me for the raggedy edges.

I tried to make it cute, though! I really did!

trader joes pizza dough
1,000% not Instagram-able

Ultimately, the hideousness didn’t matter because the pizza was SO good (as was the purple mascara, by the way).

GAH! Purple lashes! When was the last time I applied a purple tinted mascara and actually saw the color on my lashes? Um, like never?! Miraculously, I can actually see the purple from Urban Decay Double Team Special Effect Mascara in Vice, and it’s IN-YOUR-FACE PURPLE, which is awesome.

urban decay double team vice 2
See the tops of the lashes? So purple!

So, I thought the pizza was gonna be easy, right? I thought I’d just bust out my rolling pin, roll out a perfect crust of yeasty deliciousness, and toss it up in the air a few times while instrumental polka music played in the background, but noooooo.

The instructions say that you have to let the dough rest for 30 minutes before you actually start doing the thing — rolling it out, stretching it, putting stuff on it — and then it’s like 10 to 15 minutes in the oven.

connor eating pizza
NOMMAGE
trader joes pizza dough in bag
Let’s see where this goes.
trader joes pizza dough inside bag 2
Ah! Smells like yeast…and VICTORY!
trader joes pizza dough outside bag
Easiest way to remove it from the bag is to just dump it out.
trader joes pizza dough resting
I also wanna rest on a lightly floured surface for 30 minutes…

I must have missed a step, because when I tried rolling it out, the dough kept sticking to the pin…

trader joes pizza rolling pin
When rolling pins give you grief!

And when I stretched it out, that really didn’t go any better. By that point I was just like, “Accept your fate, Karen. This is going to be the world’s ugliest pizza dough crust.”

So I just went with it from there, haha!

trader joes pizza stretch
Can you tell I have no idea what I’m doing?
trader joes pizza dough 2
LOL, the edges!

I used TJ’s pizza sauce, mozzarella, a mix of prosciutto and salami (of course, when you say those words you have to use an Italian accent), and…what else? Oh! — some chopped artichoke hearts and sliced black olives, which I sprinkled on top.

trader joes pizza sauce
Strong basil notes in this sauce. I like it!
pizza sauce on pizza
1/2 cup of sauce
shredded mozarella
MOZZZZZ
trader joes sliced porsciutto
I used two slices.
trader joes applewood smoked salami
These slices are huge! I used three and tore them into little pieces.
artichoke hearts black olives
Because pizza cannot be built around salty meats alone…
ready for the oven 2
See ya in 15 minutes!
ready for the oven 1
Let’s put that bad boy in the oven.

I inhaled my first slice, and Connor, who likes pizza but doesn’t usually get *that* excited about it, was shoving it into her mouth, even the funky-looking crust.

connor checking out finished pizza
“Mom, you should probably garnish it with something green, like basil or parsley. I’m just sayin…”
urban decay  double team vice
I’m wearing Hourglass Brilliant Nude Blush on my cheeks and Urban Decay Naked Lipstick on my lips.

pizza k yum

It was fun, and the pizza was tasty. We’ll definitely be doing it again. 🙂

Your friendly neighborhood beauty addict,

Karen

Purple Lashes and the World’s Ugliest Pizza Dough Crust / Originally published April 11th, 2018

There are 24 comments on this post. Leave yours.

Categories: Eyes, Just For Fun, Makeup, Product Reviews, Urban Decay Keywords: urban decay

The products in this entry were provided by the manufacturer for consideration. For information about my posting policy, please see my Disclaimer.

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Comments

  1. Metta says

    April 11th, 2018 at 8:54 pm

    I think it actually looks yummy, I love artichoke on my pizza!! I love the color of the mascara, it looks gorgeous! I’ve been wanting to get a purple or eggplant color lately I just haven’t decided which brand because so many brands are making colorful mascaras now, I’m not sure what it is about purples but I can’t get enough of that color in my makeup!

    Reply
    • Karen says

      April 11th, 2018 at 9:11 pm

      Thanks, Metta! It was REALLY delicious. I’m going to make it again soon (maybe even tomorrow).

      I hear ya on the endless options for colorful mascara. If you really, really want a purple one, I can 100% recommend the one I’m wearing in this post by Urban Decay. I love it!

      P.S. If you love purples you’ve gotta get this liner from Sephora.

      Reply
  2. Michele DiCola says

    April 11th, 2018 at 9:28 pm

    Hi Karen ,
    I’ve dealt w that dough and many doughs !
    Forget the rolling pin .
    Let it rest and come to room temp .
    Than pick it up and gently stretch it into shape . Once you get it into the pan use your fingers to move it more and push it to fit the pan round or square .
    Use some olive oil and then your toppings .
    Mine are mozzarella cheese , mushrooms and tomato . The pizza place we order from puts the tomato sauce on top last .
    Good luck Nd let me know how you make out .

    Reply
    • Karen says

      April 12th, 2018 at 8:08 am

      Hi Michele,

      Thanks for these tips! I totally forgot to use olive oil last time on the dough… Gotta remember to try that!

      Reply
  3. Almost Alexis says

    April 11th, 2018 at 9:36 pm

    I think your pizza looks divine. There’s a kiddo with celiac disease living in my house, so any gluten-y pizza looks like the most delicious (yet forbidden) thing on earth. But I have TJ’s pizza dough tips for you that I remember from the pre-celiac diagnosis days: Let it sit on the counter for 15 minutes or so before rolling it out. It’s so much easier to roll out if it sits. (Also, if you’re making two crusts from one dough, divide it in half, and then let it sit.) Also, next time consider rolling it out with parchment paper underneath and on top, although you may find that using lightly floured fingers to poke/massage it into shape works better than a rolling pin. Then transfer it to the pizza pan.

    PS. Purple mascara looks like great fun!

    Reply
    • Karen says

      April 12th, 2018 at 8:08 am

      Hi Alexis,

      Thank you so much for these tips. I really like the idea of rolling it out between the parchment paper and think that might work for me. 🙂 So excited to try it!

      Reply
  4. Amalia says

    April 12th, 2018 at 3:31 am

    At the fifth photo, Connor’s face expression says it all! LOL! I’m trying to make decent pizza, for years, it’s impossible in domestic ovens, even with all those special cast iron pans .

    Reply
    • Karen says

      April 12th, 2018 at 7:50 am

      Hi Amalia,

      This is the first one I’ve made from scratch and I’m still wondering what I did wrong with the crust. Maybe I didn’t put enough flour on the dough before rolling it out? If you have any tips for me I would love them!

      Reply
  5. Linda Libra Loca says

    April 12th, 2018 at 5:20 am

    Home made Pizza is the best, no matter how it looks, the taste you just can´t beat.
    Linda Libra Loca recently posted … The Ordinary Niacinamide 10% + Zinc 1% – Big yellow taxi

    Reply
    • Karen says

      April 12th, 2018 at 7:48 am

      YUM!

      Reply
  6. Shannon says

    April 12th, 2018 at 6:46 am

    Ah, pizza dough! Dealing with that shiznit is an art in itself. My dad worked at a great pizza place in Seattle when he was in college, and he makes BEAUTIFUL pizzas – he can throw the crust in the air and everything! I can’t manage that, sadly – i have to work closer to the countertop, haha. But my pizza still tastes delicious 🙂

    And I have to share – there’s a SUPER EASY way to make pizza dough in your food processor! Check it: https://www.seriouseats.com/recipes/2012/07/basic-new-york-style-pizza-dough.html
    The secret to uber-tastiness is letting the dough rest for 1-2 days in the fridge. It picks up SO much flavor when you let it develop!

    Reply
    • Karen says

      April 12th, 2018 at 7:47 am

      Yum, I bet it’s delicious! I’ve made a bread that rests for about 18 hours and it tastes so much better than the ones that rise for a few hours. That extra time makes such a difference.

      So, when you’re working the dough on the countertop, do you use a rolling pin? Or your hands? I wonder what I was doing wrong…

      Reply
      • Shannon says

        April 12th, 2018 at 8:01 am

        I only use my hands. And plenty of flour! It helps to shape the dough into a ball (kind of like a boule loaf) before you let it rise, IMO. After it’s risen and the dough is a little looser, dump it onto a well-floured surface and sprinkle flour on top of the dough. Then I’ll sort of make an indent of the edge/crust with my fingers, around the outer edge of the ball. Then I’ll use that as a guide to kind of stretch the middle of the crust out, from the edges. Always work with the roundness of the pie! Once it has a bit more of a disc shape to it (rather than a “ball” shape), I’ll pick it up and stretch it with the back of my hands. I let one side of the edge of the crust sit a little above my knuckles & let the other side drape down, and then I use my hands to just shuffle it around in a circle. Gravity does a lot of the work of stretching!

        It’s so weird trying to explain it, haha. Hopefully that all makes sense!

        Reply
        • Karen says

          April 12th, 2018 at 8:06 am

          I can visualize stretching it over the backs of the hands, and now that I think about it, I’ve seen it done before. YES!!! Thanks Shannon. I will use all your tips next time I try it. I am going to conquer pizza dough, dagnabbit. LOL

          Oh, one more question for you… What pizza sauce do you use/like?

          Reply
          • Shannon says

            April 12th, 2018 at 8:14 am

            Haha! Yes, it’s pretty intuitive once you get the hang of it!

            I make my own pizza sauce – my dad’s rule of thumb is that it’s like pasta sauce, but has to be VERY INTENSE because it’s such a small portion of the pie. So I use a base of plain ol’ tomato sauce, and then dump in LOADS of black pepper, garlic powder (rehydrated) or fresh garlic paste, and dried basil, along with a “normal” amount of salt. If you want more sweetness you can either add tomato paste (totally ups the sweetness quotient) or sugar. And then I cook it all down til it’s a little more thick than your typical pasta sauce, maybe like 30 min or so? My dad claims oregano takes over the flavor if you add it to the pot, so he sprinkles it on top of his pizza sauce & under the cheese. 🙂 I always intend to do this and then forget, haha. But you can take that sauce idea and then run with it! You can add anything you like, really.

          • Karen says

            April 12th, 2018 at 8:28 am

            I just copied and pasted this recipe to my “to cook soon” file. 🙂 Is there a specific tomato sauce you like? I’ve heard Tuttorosso is very good but have yet to try it. Allegedly it tastes super fresh. Also, re: olive oil. Does your dad ever brush it onto the dough before putting on the sauce, toppings, etc.?

          • Shannon says

            April 12th, 2018 at 9:14 am

            I usually just get whatever tomato sauce is on sale, ha! I’m sure it makes a difference, I just haven’t compared different brands. (I need to start paying attention to that..)
            I think my dad generally doesn’t use olive oil pre-sauce, but that’s probably more of a personal preference thing.

          • Karen says

            April 12th, 2018 at 10:20 am

            Haha, me too! I’ve heard it can make all the difference though, but have really yet to do any sort of experiments to find out for myself.

            Thanks again for the sauce recipe. I’m now debating over whether or not I should get reduced fat cheese… MEH.

  7. Tatiana says

    April 12th, 2018 at 10:32 am

    So I rarely shop at TJ’s because they’re like a zoo down this way and I cannot deal with pushy crowds and waiting forever in checkout lines. Not to mention what traffic is like within two blocks of the store. I call it the TJ driving brain suck, because it seems no one can follow the rules of driving when they’re near that store. They’re so focused on getting into the teeny, tiny, parking lot that they forget how to drive. Grrr.
    So anyway, where in the store do I find this dough? Freezer, shelf, refrigerated case? This is something I might try to hunt for. Yeah, that’s another thing, I always have to hunt for what I want because nothing seems to appear in a logical spot in that store.

    Reply
  8. Rhia says

    April 12th, 2018 at 10:34 am

    I just had pizza for lunch yesterday and now I’m craving it again thanks to this post! Your daughter has grown so much, she’s adorable. Love the mascara on you. I often forget how purple brings out brown eyes.

    Reply
  9. Kate says

    April 12th, 2018 at 10:49 am

    I, too, like using Trader Joe’s pizza dough. I learned a couple of tips from friends (not professionals, just experienced home cooks) along the way. First, that time to bring to room temp is critical to rolling out the dough. I’ve done between 30 min to 1 hr. Second, I was instructed to add enough flour so it’s no longer sticky when rolling out with a rolling pin or shaping with your hands. Also, the same friend said grilling it on an oiled cast iron pan makes the best pizza. Haven’t had a chance to do that, but I have baked it in a cast iron pan. Makes the pizza hold a better shape, although I can’t get the crust as thin as I would like. Hope these tips help you like they’ve helped me.

    P.S. I LOVE you Hourglass brow tip of brushing against the grain! It’s like a lightbulb went off for me! Works great on my brows and saves me so much time. Using Glossier’s Boy Brow and Benefit’s Gimme Brow at the moment but will get the Hourglass one with the Sephora sale.

    Reply
  10. Lily says

    April 12th, 2018 at 11:52 am

    That pizza looks perfect. Rustic in a good trendy expensive pizza joint kinda way. (Antico in Atlanta). Yum!

    Reply
  11. Chelsea says

    April 12th, 2018 at 4:57 pm

    I feel like Connor’s got some side-eye skills, and I’m here for it.

    Pizza looks good, as do your lashes!

    Reply
  12. Emme says

    April 13th, 2018 at 11:41 am

    What are you using for foundation/concealer/powder here? Looks really good.

    Reply

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Welcome to Makeup and Beauty Blog
Hi there! I’m Karen, your friendly neighborhood beauty addict, and I’m a Bay Area girl who hoards brown eyeshadow and covets coral lipstick. Every morning, I wake up and say, “I’m going to do something other than a smoky eye today.” Then…I end up doing a smoky eye anyway (most days). When I’m not putting on makeup, taking pictures of makeup or writing about makeup, which I’ve been doing daily since 2007 (!), you’ll find me hanging out with my hubby (“El Hub”), my four-year-old daughter (Connor Claire) and my torbie girl cat (Pretty Girl Rosie, a.k.a. PGR).

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