Good morning, friend. Happy Friday…
I’m doing my best to smile and keep a positive cattitude right now, because I don’t want to evoke any more disappointment or sadness or frustration or pain at a time when the news is 24/7 heartbreaking.
If you’ve turned on the news once in the past two days, you know what I’m talking about. 🙁
So, let’s talk about frivolous stuff, because the serious issues will still be serious at the end of the day. We Americans will still have to figure these things out, but right now…at this moment, on this blog, I want to talk about things like gray hair.
Early yesterday morning, as I was getting ready to take Connor to her two-year pediatric checkup, I looked at my roots and thought, dammit, I really gotta do something about this situation, because I’m about two weeks from my next hair coloring appointment.
I don’t usually mind the process of covering up my grays myself during the weeks when my roots go from barely noticeable to OH, SH*T GIRL between salon visits, taking the root cover-up spray, and spraying it on, and then using the crayon for baby hairs up front. It hasn’t been a big deal, but for some reason it was this past month and a half. It was a big pain in the @ss.
I don’t want to say that I’m lazy…but I just might be, LOL! The last thing I want to do is deal with covering up my grays. I just don’t want to do it. Also, I haven’t been into the way these products make my roots feel stiff…
I get on these weird kicks, and right now I don’t like it when my hair feels lacquered in any way, but between the spray and the waxy crayon, that’s how my hair feels, like there’s pounds of product in it.
So the other night I couldn’t go to sleep, and I thought, like…what if I just grew my hair out and let my salt ‘n’ pepper hair come through? What if I committed to just growing out my gray?
It would take about a year, and I could write about it! I could let it grow out, see what happens, and if I end up not liking how it looks, I’ll just dye my hair again. Among other things, “it’s something to do,” and I’ve always been the kind of person who likes to be in the process of doing something with my hair, whether it’s growing it out, cutting it short, doing bangs, pink streaks, or waiting for a new season to change the color again. I’ve always liked to play with my hair.
So I think I’m gonna do this. I even started researching how to grow out gray hair, BUT THEN I watched some freakin’ J. Lo music videos and started googling J. Lo pics, and can I just say that J. Lo is the high pony of all high ponytails? OY!
I keep wanting to quit her, but I can’t. She’s been a hair/makeup icon of mine for so many years. I think, like, “Karen, you really have to move on,” but then I watch a J. Lo video, and it doesn’t matter if it’s from back in the day or something new, and I’m like, “DAMMIT, J. LO! YOU ARE MY HASHTAG #GOALS.”
She’s the only reason I do squats, for one, and her hair is so beautiful! I love the caramel tones, the layering, the length… It’s just so luscious!
Anyway, I was watching her videos and looking at her hair and thinking, “Hmm… Maybe I shouldn’t let my grays grow out. Maybe I should do something caramel-ly or butterscotch-y instead!”
I dunno… I don’t know what I’m going to do.
Speaking of J. Lo…the makeup in the Get Right video is everything. It’s the video where she plays a bunch of different characters, and um…some of the makeup looks a little dated, but I think it still looks so pretty, like the shots where she’s wearing the black crop top, the low black pants and her hoops, and the black jacket with the fur. She’s got this frosty bronze eye that goes from lash line to brow bone, and yeah, the eye makeup very mid-2000s, but her skin and her glossy nude lips… J. Lo, you are stomping the runway of my suburban existence!
OK, let me put some dry shampoo on my hair because it’s gross right now…
One last thing, I’m thinking about perhaps doing some posts with eyeshadow blending tips, like a blending boot camp series. If I do, what kinds of things and looks and techniques would you like to see? What kind of things do you struggle with? Do you not know which brushes to use? Does your eyeshadow end up looking patchy? Tell me what you’d like to improve upon, and I’ll see what I can do.
Take care, friend. TGIF. Talk to you soon.
Your friendly neighborhood beauty addict,
Karen
God bless you, Karen. I feel like blogs like yours are a huge public service, especially in times like these. It’s hard, we have work to do, yet it’s ok to also live life and be interested in our hobbies and passions. That balance makes us human, that boldness to live itself is rebellion against the darkness.
I also struggle with the grays. I don’t normally mind them peeping through, but sometimes I feel like the gray hairs shine as brightly as fiber optics. They’re so dang confident! Once while I was checking out at Walmart the cashier who seemed to be in her 50s complemented me on my hair. She said sincerely, “I love how your gray is coming in, it’s beautiful.” It was such a cool thing for her to say, to uplift me like that, finding beauty in the process of aging, affirming a woman just beginning to notice the effects of getting older. I felt like she was initiating me into the secret club of badass older chicks. I’ll still most likely dye my hair again in the future, but gray is ok, too. ♥️
God bless you, too, Jaclyn. You’re so nice to chat with; it almost feels like you’re here, holding my hand and taking a few calming breaths with me.
That was such a nice thing for the cashier to say. I love it when people are kind out of the blue like that! What does your gray look like? Is it peppered throughout your hair, or do you have one of those cool chunky gray streaks in the front?
Hi Karen! I’m Karen too, lol! As someone who started going gray at a young age, I spent years and years on the dye treadmill, I tried it all from going darker to going lighter to the whole highlights routine. Finally I decided to embrace the silver hair and I’ve seriously never been happier with it. It’s in fantastic condition for the first time since I can remember, and I don’t need any fancy products to keep it healthy and shiny. I get more compliments on it than I ever did on my dyed hair. Do I look like J. Lo? No, lol.
I look like me.
Anyway, as for how to do it, there are some ways to ease the transition at bit. I found that using a semi permanent color for a few years before I really decided to do it was helpful – that way much of the color faded out when I quit dyeing, so there wasn’t such a harsh line. I also got super-ashy highlights, but they did oxidize and turn yellow which is so not my color – that wasn’t the best move for me personally, but it did all grow out eventually.
Just keep in mind that at your length, it will take more like four years than one. I spent about 13 months transitioning (i.e. not dyeing at all), and then cut my hair to a chin-length bob and was totally dye-free. However, you are probably not as gray as me – in my mid-40s, I’m a good 75% gray (nearly white in the front/sides) so it will all not be as noticeable for you.
Anyway, there are some awesome bloggers who have documented their beautiful silver journeys, like Lauren (How Bourgeois) and Kristin (Highland Fashionista). I’ve also posted a bit about it on my own blog (really more for my own friends) but I don’t compare with those ladies.
Whatever you decide, have fun with it! It’s just hair. 🙂
Karen Freeman recently posted … Healthy and Delicious 2 Ingredient Cherry Frozen Yogurt
Hi Karen,
Thanks for these great tips! I was actually thinking about doing the whole chin-length bob thing, too. Perhaps doing low-lights for a year as the regrowth worked it’s way through, then cutting it off into a-line bob (which is something I’ve had before and enjoyed). Right now the long hair is handy though because I can just throw it into a bun or a pony and not have to worry about it.
Has the texture of your hair changed much since you’ve decided to go gray?
Happy Friday to you!
Happy Friday to you as well! The texture of my hair is improved DRASTICALLY since I decided to go gray, actually. Without all the damage the dye was doing, my hair is so much softer and more manageable. I know some people complain of wirey grays, but I haven’t experienced that at all. But if I were one of those folks who got wirey gray hairs, dye wouldn’t really fix that, would it? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
The one thing I always request from my hairstylist is to leave me enough length for a ponytail. With the short bob I had, that ponytail was basically a silly little paintbrush, but it stayed out of my face at the gym! 😉
How interesting! One of my worries is roughly textured white strands, because I do get an occasional ramen-noodle strand here and there! During my deep dive into gray hair the other night I read that some women feel like they have to blow their hair out to iron out the wire-y aspect, which is something I’m not keen on, so if I end up growing mine out I hope my situation is similar to yours. *crosses fingers* Do you use any special gray color-enhancing shampoos or conditioners, or do you just let it do it’s own thang?
Bobs are wonderful but, yeah, you gotta get a length that works for you. If I hadn’t been able to pull mine back when I had mine, I would’ve lost my damn mind every time I went running!
I really just use whatever shampoo and conditioner is on sale at Target that week! And a leave-in conditioner (I like the generic Sally Beauty version of Sebastian’s Potion 9). No special products needed. Once in a while I use a clarifying shampoo and deep condition. I only blow dry my hair partway, and that’s really only so it doesn’t freeze solid (I live in a cold climate). On warm days I just let it air-dry; I barely touch a hairdryer all summer long.
My hair is curly, so in order to get it straight like in my avatar photo here, I would have to get a salon blow-out or spend an inordinate amount of time and heat on it myself. Needless to say, I do that rarely.
I know what you mean about the ramen hair, I have a couple of those in my eyebrows, they are still brown but caaarazy, but that’s another whole saga. 😀
But regardless, any hair issues I have are due to its own unique texture (we’re talking frizz city on humid days – precisely as it has been since my youth), not related to the gray at all.
Sounds like you have my dream low-maintenance hair, oh my gosh! That’s my ideal situation. No need for any specific products so I don’t have to be married to anything, along with minimal effort, yet still a pretty style and color. Dare to dream!
By the way, I’m a curly girl, too! Well, more like a wavy girl. It took a long time to accept the waves and fall in love with them. Did you always like having curly hair?
I can’t “reply” to your last comment in the right spot, so I’ll answer your question here – no, I definitely did not always like my texture! I’m really more wavy than curly, which worked ok in the big-hair 80s, but it was torture in the flat-hair 90s! I was forever trying to beat it into straight-hair submission. It was freeing myself from the dye that really sort of gave me the “permission” to let my hair be what it actually is – somewhere between wavy and curly. Frizz is still an issue come summer, but much, much less so than when I was attempting to straighten every day. I find that the less I do to it, the better.
Karen, your hair is GORGEOUS. I know you put a lot of effort into it to get camera ready, but really, trust your hair to do its thang and just see what happens.
My wavy hair story is similar to yours. In the ’80s I was loving life, LOL! Did you ever use L’Oreal Pumping Curls? Every curly haired girl I knew LIVED off of that stuff. But yeah, like you, I spent the better part of the ’90s ironing my hair straight. Like literally using a clothes iron to straighten it, OMG. My mom caught me once and launched right into an hour long lecture about how I was gonna burn my face off accidentally and that was the end of that. Then came the blow dryers and round brushes and straightening serums. Think about all those hours we spent straightening! It was probably enough to learn a new language, or, at the very least, engineer a better mousetrap. LOL!
Thank you for the nice hair compliment, Karen! 🙂 And for all the great advice.
I’m letting my grey show! I’m 39 and I think my grey is pretty. I debated a long time (even before I had any grey) about whether I wanted to color it, and also about how I would want to go about transitioning from color to grey. In the end, I decided not to color it at all. Not because I am opposed to color (I love it), but because some part of me felt that it wasn’t being true to myself (funny, I feel completely different about hair coloring for fun and fashion – it’s great fun), and I didn’t like the idea of covering a part of myself I think is beautiful. Men are always thought of as handsome and distinguished when they have grey, whereas women often describe grey hair as making themselves or other women as looking old or undone. I don’t feel that way. Grey is great!
Hi Hihellonikki,
Ooh, tell me more about your hair. How much of your hair is gray? Are you 100%? How was the process of growing it out like, and how long did it take?
I’m in my late 20s and under my hair dye have a few white strands coming in, too. 🙁 At least they’re strands and not the entire thing but ugh. Maybe I could coax it into turning into a Rogue (from X-Men) or Bonnie Raitt look. At least when my hair is white it’ll be easier to dye bright colors, because hopefully I wouldn’t need bleach!
And yes, I need Blending Boot Camp. What the hell am I doing? How do you decide which colors to blend together? And which brushes do you use? (I’m actually really liking e.l.f.’s white eyeshadow brushes; they’re very soft and very cheap. $1!) How do you decide which brushes to use? How do people do all of this???? Thanks, Karen!
Hi SJ,
Last weekend I chatted with a woman who was in her 30s and had this GORGEOUS gray streak in the front of her head a la Rogue from X-Men. I don’t think mine will do that but I wish it would!
Thanks for your feedback on Blending Boot Camp, because it helps me steer the series in a way that will help you out the most. Do you have any other questions or things you’d like to know about blending?
Also, how are you currently picking what colors to wear with what?
I’m currently picking out colors by using palettes that tell me which color is designed to go where. So my other palettes without that are sadly going unused. Although I do sometimes try by myself with green eyeshadow on my lid, and then I guess to calm it down I need a more brownish color in the crease, and find some kind of bronze or brown to smooth it out.
I will basically drink up anything you write about blending, seriously. Your blog is my favorite makeup blog because you try so many different things and figure out how to make different things and trends work for you.
The palettes with the “how to use it” built in are VERY handy! It’s also nice to have the freedom/knowledge to be able to improv a bit too, so I can add this aspect into the series. How much time do you typically give yourself for eye makeup on most days?
I’m so glad you enjoy MBB. 🙂 I love being here, too, and helping people learn a little more about makeup is my FAVORITE, especially with the how-tos.
at 40 the idea of going gray is ooh what fun
at my age* it’s NOT
so try it out it might work
some people have the right skin and eye color to make it work
I am not one of them
*note how age it not actually disclosed ☺
Seriously, if you let it happen naturally might not be as bad as stopping completely and dealing with that situation. But it does make you look older
You’re so cute, Isabella! You bring up a point that crossed my mind… Often people assume that I’m in my 30s, which I love. If I let the gray grow out I probably won’t be able to ride that waves anymore. I met a girl last weekend with gray hair who was in her 30s, and she didn’t look like she was doing it for the sake of fashion — I think she really had naturally gray hair, and she looked amazing. She also had a full-face of makeup on and was dressed to the nine’s though.
Go for it Karen, you can go back to the dye.
an experiment for the blog?
I grew mine out an inch + and saw a selfie I took. #notpretty #notkiddingmyself
There is a lot of online chat about this among women my age, it’s quite divisive for some reason. Although aging gracefully is BS
I figured as much. Plus it’s been FOREVER — like almost 20 years — since I’ve worn my hair naturally. It would be a big change. And so much cheaper than getting it colored!
Yes, I’ve also noticed that there’s a lot of passion (aka strong opinions) online about beauty as women move into mid-life and onward. Not just with hair, but also with smile and laugh lines (or what I like to call “experience lines”). I haven’t quite figured out how I’m going to handle things yet. Because on one hand I’m like, sure, if there’s things like Botox available, why not? A lot of my friends do it. And if I can do it in a way that feels true to me, and if I like the results, yeah, I might consider it. But the other part of me is like, this is my face, and I’ve earned every smile and laugh line on it. I don’t want to look like everyone else. I’m also afraid of looking in the mirror and not recognizing the person staring back at me, you know? I know these are all such a small trivial in the scheme of the bigger things though. It’s all quite silly once you think about it, and if sh*t were to hit the fan, like the zombies were descending upon humanity as we know it, I’d be like screw it, I’d be happy to brush my teeth.
Girl. I’m growing my gray (white) hair out and it feels like it’s taking forever. I think it’s been around a year and I still have about 4 inches left of colored hair. My hair doesn’t grow super fast but, man. I just got tired of coloring it at home. I like the extra contrast I get with my skintone and darker hair (natural color is a light-medium cool brown with some red and blonde bits) but the upkeep was tiresome. Most of the white for me is at my temples and my hair is thinner at the front, so having it colored made it look like it was thicker and my forehead wasn’t so wide, ha. But once I got used to seeing it lighter again, I don’t mind. It also is more streaky now which almost looks like highlights.
Hey Nicole,
How did you do it? Did you just go cold turkey?!
At first I used something like Manic Panic in a dark purple that toned some of the more reddish looking dyed hair and darkened the roots and briefly looked actually purple in the white. I would apply it before taking a shower and rinse it out then, so I wasn’t taking the time of a full color or anything. Then later I mixed in a bunch of that color into my regular conditioner for sort of a diy toner. Once that was finished, I stopped doing anything special. I thought about trying to go the color removal route but at home it’s pretty tedious to do without a real guarantee on good results and I didn’t want to pay to have someone else do it either. Once there was several inches of growth, it started looking almost ombre-ish and intentional because the ends were lighter and warmer. I also chopped it as short as I was comfortable with (around chin length) early on. I think it was relatively easy transition for me since I only have a lot at the front. I have some everywhere but it’s much less dense.
Girl… That sounds relatively painless. I like the idea of transitioning the color slowly. It sounds easier to bear than just going cold turkey and dealing with the harsh line of demarcation, ya know?! Do you think you’ll keep it the length you have it at the moment? Or do you plan to grow it long? I love the idea of long, gray hair for some reason.
Totally. I have a friend who has probably 75%+ gray who recently grew it out. She had been coloring it dark brown so she had to go blonde to make it less stark. I had been wanting to grow it out long previously, but I’m not sure now. It’s not the easiest with my face shape and lack of hair volume, so we’ll see. I figure I’ll keep it short until I can get all this old dye chopped and reassess. I seem to waffle between bob and long hair every several years. 😀
Nicole – paleandfreckled recently posted … Beauty Favorites – December into January 2018
Ha, you and me both! If you love bobs you have to check out Sal Salcedo on Instagram. The wavy bobs he does are super inspiring. Every time one pops up on his feed I get *this close* to chopping off my hair.
Is your lack of volume pregnancy related? My hair *still* hasn’t fully recovered after giving birth to Connor. It’s been two years and the areas near my temples where a lot of hair out are barely starting to fill in again, and the hairs that are growing back are grey.
It’s probably part of it but I also have hypothyroidism which has been medicated for a long time now but I think what I was losing before then never fully recovered. Or maybe it’s just age related! It’s still fairly thick in the back though. And I recall stylists being reluctant to do bangs because of lack of hair in the front for quite a few years. ?
Seriously, consider not getting bangs a blessing in disguise. I mean, they’re fun, but they’re so high maintenance! Plus they can be surprisingly itchy.
Happy Friday!
I most generally have highlights in my hair usually very subtle but dyed hair can look so fake. That’s why I do it.
My stylist said you can let the greys grow out and disguise with highlights. Apparently I don’t have enough yet. Mine are mainly around my face. I used to go every 5 weeks but trying to string it out to every 12 weeks using the L’Oreal cover up spray and a brush on powder the salon gave me.
I’m getting tired of the cost plus they start peeking out in 2 weeks.
Hi Janine,
Happy Friday to you too! I also use a coverup spray (I alternate between L’Oreal and Rita Hazan). Have you ever used the Rita Hazan crayon? When I’m not feeling lazy (like now), I like it for the little baby hairs around the perimeter of my face.
I finally decided to start covering my grays last year. I get a semi-permanent color and so far I only have to do color every other time. I’ve thought about what I want to do long term about growing out my grays, but I’m not ready do do that yet.
Happy Friday!
I would’ve never guessed that you have grays, as your hair color is so luscious and beautiful! Do you do it yourself?
Happy Friday to you, too.
P.S. I hope Louis (and the rest of the crew) had an extra special Valentines’s Day.
Aww, thank you! I get my hair colored at the salon. I could probably do it myself, but I’m happy to let my stylist to take care of it.
We had a pretty low key Valentine’s Day, which was perfect. 🙂 Did you get to celebrate with ice cream?
LOL, no, we decided to save the celebration for this weekend. We’re driving out to my parents’ house to have a belated Valentine’s Day movie date! 🙂 Also, El Hub fell asleep on the couch, haha!
So what’s the plan for the weekend? Got any new books lined up?
I fell asleep on the couch too. 🙂 Sounds like a fun way to celebrate.
I’m going to my parent’s house on Saturday to learn how to cook a couple of Indian dishes. I feel like there’s some technique involved that I need to learn from Mom.
No new books, yet! I think I want to catch up on some TV watching this weekend. 🙂
It was, to be honest. I really wanted to work out and was happy to get my sweat on. Plus we’ve just been both really tired. Life with a toddler is fun but exhausting!
How cool that you’ll learn some cool cooking tricks from mom. What dishes are you planning to make?
We’re making a green chicken curry with cilantro and another dish with kale and shredded coconut. I know that sounds weird, but it’s quite tasty!
I’ve been trying to work out regularly too, but I really have to prioritize it during the weekdays.
That sounds really good! Is the kale and coconut in a soupy or a saucy base?
It’s actually just sauteed with the coconut and some other seasoning. My mom uses frozen, chopped kale and she said it’s very easy to make. I’m excited to learn how to make it.
I’m not a fan of raw kale but will happily eat cooked kale if it has yummy seasoning. I bet the coconut adds a lovely texture to the dish!
Thanks for the distraction. Much needed.
Hope you will do a demo of how to blend eyeshadow without creating a muddy mess! Most days I just use Chanel Memory on its own, because I haven’t mastered blending. Thanks and have a happy weekend!
Hi Lily,
I’m still planning out the series, so I’ll either do some gifs or short videos. I know it really helps to have moving visuals. So, question for you — when you’re blending and everything becomes muddy, is this typically with powder eyeshadows? Or are you using creams?
Powder. I do better with creams. Thanks!
Karen thank you for this insight !
Just like 9-11 we needed to do normal things to feel normal !
You might be shocked to hear that at age 69 ( gulp ) I do not struggle w gray hair !
Just overweight pounds . Have been doing WW since May and lost 26 pounds but was hoping for more !
Hi Michele,
Good for you for working so hard and losing the weight! You’re an inspiration. I know it’s difficult work. You’re doing great!
I let my gray grow out & went totally natural about 3-4 years ago. I knew I couldn’t handle a stark demarcation line (I’d been colouring my dark blonde hair light brown, so the line would’ve been really obvious) so I had a few sessions of highlights, which my stylist toned to match my natural colour as closely as possible.
I get tons of compliments on my colour, I’ve actually had women ask me who does my colour lol. And I’m often mistaken as being about 5 years younger than I am.
I’m actually about to try a keratin smoothing treatment to try and help with managing my hair. It’s been super frizzy ever since I had Sally, and I just don’t have the time or energy to constantly tame it. I feel unkempt with frizzy hair, and I want to look more polished, as well as have hair that dries faster and is easier to style.
Hi Janet,
So it’s kind of amazing how much pregnancy changes your hair, right?! I didn’t experience any change in texture, mostly a big change in thickness. A lot of mine fell about about three months after giving birth, and I still have these bald patches near my temples where the hair is very slow to grow back in.
How is Sally doing these days?
At 47, I got tired of the amount of hours and money spent at the hairdresser to cover my greys, only to see them peaking through 2 weeks after. I had very long brown hair with caramel highlights and had always been proud of my long hair. I decided to stop colouring it and letting it grow slowly grey, but 4 months in, I wasn’t loving the color contrast of my growing salt and pepper hair against the colored strands. I was on vacation abroad and saw a nice looking salon at a mall. I went in and asked the lady to cut off as much as she could to get rid of the colored hair! She asked me 3 times if I was sure before she did it. I left with a salt and pepper pixie cut that suits my small frame better than my long hair ever did, my hair is healthy, soft and strong, and I’ve never received so many compliments, including saying I look younger! With so much gray! I’ve had to adapt my makeup and clothes though and use strong colors otherwise I look washed out. But it’s so freeing, and I have more time and money. Do I miss my long highlighted hair? Sometimes. Do I think I made the right decision? Absolutely! But you do you, like everyone should. All the best, whatever your decision!
Hi Carla,
Thank you so much for sharing your story. It’s inspiring! Do you still have the pixie cut, or have you grown your hair out?
Nope, still rocking the pixie 2 years down the line. In my opinion, one thing about gray hair is that I think you need to keep a good cut and style it properly, especially for those with unruly waves like me, otherwise it looks unkempt. So the pixie helps keep it neat and stylish without much fuss.
J Lo is hair and everything else #goals, but my hair is so far from looking like hers that I wouldn’t even think about doing something similar. I am though contemplating changing my hair up a bit, from blonde to more of a balayage darker blonde. My grey aren’t really noticeable yet, or maybe I just don’t see them in the blonde hair, so I cannot offer any advice there.
LindaLibraLoca recently posted … The Birthday Tag – LLL Vlogs 34
Yeah she is! I dedicate all my squats in HIIT class to her, LOL!
Happy Friday to you!
I have a hair appointment on Monday and I don’t know what I’m going to do, either! Probably the same as usual, dye it close to my natural color and try to cover up the greys that are poking through. Maybe a few warm highlights for dimension.
As far as eyeshadow my problem is hooded lids. There isn’t much point in me blending lots of colors and going all out because you can’t really see it anyways!
And J.Lo is gorgeous, I don’t know how she does it!
Hi Rachel,
You can do a lot with hooded lids and eyeshadow. My eyes are semi-hooded at the moment and I’ve learned that a lot of it is placement and the thinness/thickness of the liner you’re wearing. Thank you for this feedback because I’ll add it into my list of notes for Bootcamp. 🙂
How’s your Friday going so far? I just got back from a very exciting trip to Tar-ghay.
Ah Target. I went a couple nights ago and got a couple T-shirt’s and a dress from the “A New Day” line for a baby shower I am hosting (yikes!) I am going out for sushi tonight, yum!
Sometimes I think I might as well set up temporary residence there because I’m literally there every day. In fact I have to go back tomorrow to get my mom some coconut Thai chai tea.
How nice that you’re hosting a shower! Do you have everything planned, the food, the games, etc.?
P.S. Enjoy your sushi tonight.
Short answer, no, I don’t have a lot planned for the shower. I ordered invites online, am planning on getting a lot of food from Sam’s club, and I’m asking everyone to bring a baby picture so we can do a guess who’s who game. I’m mostly worried about cleaning and organizing beforehand!
First, I cannot believe that Connor is 2! How did that happen? Second, the news is beyond depressing, creating all kinds of despair, so talking about what to do about grays helps our collective anxiety level. Third, I say no to gray, but of course it’s your decision. I would go with the J. Lo inspired caramel-butterscotch highlights instead if you’re in the mood for a change. Also, I use a powder root coverup, and I don’t mind it. It’s not so waxy, crispy like some of the other methods. 4) Yes to the blending boot camp! And yes to which brushes work best where! Have a good weekend <3
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Hi Allison,
Thanks for your feedback on blending boot camp! I’ll put your suggestions into my notes. 🙂
BTW, what powder root coverup do you use? Is it easy to wash out?
I am starting to grow mine! Don’t have many ; at first my husband or daughter tears them up for me,then I used the crayon and now I’ve decided to let them be! I have tan skin very similar to yours and they look so sexy in contrast with a pretty tan. Love to bronze the scalp
with powder bronzer and let the hair naturally flow. My husband told me he like it ?
I love all the feedback about growing out gray hair, I recently grew mine out and can really relate to so much of what has been said. I actually don’t think it’s a trivial topic, it’s so much about aging, self-esteem, self-perception, owning one’s body and femaleness…I could go on. I would really encourage you to do it, it’s such an interesting experience. I agree with Karen about textural change, my hair is much smoother but less curly and only needs a bit of oil (after so many years of so many products)! Have a lovely weekend!
Happy Friday! It’s nice to go on beauty blogs and escape harsh reality for a little bit. I need to do my roots, too. My hair thinks I’m a different age than my brain does, and it’s very disconcerting. 😉
It’s so hard to believe Connor is almost 2! My older son turns 23 years next weekend, and my younger son turns 21 years at the end of March.
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If I were you, I wouldn’t worry about a small amount of gray as that is to be expected in anyone over 40. I wasn’t so lucky – my hair started going gray in high school, and by the time I was 30 it was more than 50% gray. I was always treated like I was older than I was, and by the time I was in my late 30s people would ask me if I wanted the senior citizen rate for things! My face, mind you, *never* looked old – these people judged me by the percentage of gray hair I had, only! I’ve always been a non-conformist, so I kept my hair natural until I was 44, when I got totally fed up with people, including DOCTORS, treating me like a 2nd class citizen due to my gray hair (because they judged me to be too old to worry about). Since losing all my hair to chemotherapy last year, I have vowed never to complain about my hair when I finally get it back to its original length (before chemo). I will probably continue to dye my hair as long as I have to work for a living.
I have a hard time making my blended eye lewks look semetrical. Would love some tips on that!
Hi Karen – I’m pretty near your age (42 in July) and started graying in my early 20s. Now my hair is almost completely gray – though my gray hairs are more like white, and they are definitely more coarse and curly than my few remaining muddy brown hairs. I’ve always colored my hair so covering the gray wasn’t really a hardship for me, though my roots certainly bother me a lot more now. (Oribe root cover spray –
stupid pricey but the best). My answer to “should I grow out the gray” is the same as my answer to “should I get Botox” or “should I wear false eyelashes” or “should I get a boob job” – do whatever makes you look in the mirror and say, “Yeah, that’s me”. A lot of women look gorgeous with gray hair (frankly I’m jealous) but I know that’s not right for me. There’s nothing wrong with investing in feeling your best, whether that is dying your hair, going to therapy, working out, meditating, or drinking kale smoothies (can’t do it – I’ve tried!). The important thing is that we support our brothers and sisters in being the selves they wanna be and that we don’t do the work for anyone else’s sake. My friends say “I want to look pretty for my husband” or “I don’t want to be the fat mom at the pool” or and it makes me so sad, especially since the judgement and criticism is really only coming from within – your husband loves you and sees you as beautiful, and no one at the pool is looking at your tummy! I dye my hair because the me I want to see in the mirror has shiny golden brown hair and for no other reason, and I think that’s okay.
The good news is that if you grow out the gray and don’t like it, you can change it. If only making kale smoothies palatable were that easy.
Nice to gather here with everyone Karen, such a sad, upsetting few days. Although my grey hair&my lack of eyeshadow skills aren’t exactly uplifting ? I’m with Rachel, hooded eyeshadow tutorials, blending skills (so not muddy&looks polished) sign me up! Can’t wait! I stare at a pallette and have no clue (other than the light shades) what to use.
Well, pretty lady, if J. Lol is your hair idol- you are mine….Ive been through alot with perfecting non brassy highlights lol As I’ve mentioned, my hair is dark natural chocolate brown, with mahogany reddish baliyage similar to yours. I’ve brought your photos to my stylist gf (who’s really great with my brunette pita wavy hair) to remind her to stay in this tone lol She loves your hair&thinks its perfection on you. Now with grey coming thru wiry, I just use Pure Blends color deposit shampoo (Cocoa and a custom mixed for me) every day and on dry roots as needed for an hour, and don’t sweat the texture as much. I’ve tried a bob, tried growing in grey pieces etc when I wanted easier… it wasn’t an age thing why I didn’t keep -silver hair is sooo beautiful on some lucky women, it just wasnt flattering on me, washed me out. My dark reddish chocolate actually is like wearing makeup, lights up my complexion at 49 ? My hair is wavy and coarse but fine, I need textured long layers with bangs. It’s lower maintenance bizarrely. But this is the fun of changing it up if you can! When you reach my age, you know hey, don’t try that again when you get bored lol
My eyeshadow often looks muddy — maybe I blend too aggressively? Not with the right brush?
Definitely blending and also, which colours/shades to use where. I just look at my eyeshadow palette and shut it again – I don’t know where to start….
I started going gray when I was 17. I thought it was cool then. Now that 50 is in view, and I’m 90-95% gray, not so much. When I was 30, I thought at 40 I’d stop coloring. I’m 48 now and counting down the days (7) until my next color appointment. I’m following the philosophy of an auntie who said, “as long as Miss Clairol makes hair color, I will not be gray.” Vain and pricey, I know, but that’s where I am right now.
As far as the blending boot camp, sign me up. I’m always in awe of people who can use 4 eye colors and it’s beautiful. I try two and liner and I feel like it’s a mess. But that didn’t stop me from buying another eye palette this morning!
I am all for blending boot camp!
This was such a fun post. Yesterday and this morning were pretty bad (although Zack went to buy me fudge and cupcakes yesterday to cheer me up) and this is a nice cheer-up.
I recently turned 45 and my very dark brown hair has been slowly going grey for about 25 years now. I have never died it to get rid of the grey, but I have used semi permanent colors (like Manic Panic & Ardell Bights & Brights) to accent my hair color. hen I started to go grey I decided to just let it go, unless it got stupid looking and then I’d do something about it. Luckily, I went grey much the way my mom did (who used to get her short hair frosted), so the grey looks like highlights. My hair has gone from longer than my shoulders to buzzed short on the sides and a faux hawk on top and the grey really adds some sparkle & pizzazz. I recommend taking a chance and letting the grey grow. If it starts to look bad, just color it, but maybe it’ll look very cool. I know now everyone will agree with me when I say, “It’s just hair.” Heck, the younger me wouldn’t have said it, but with age comes wisdom… and some grey hairs. 😉
I think it would be AWESOME if you grew out the grays!! Lately I just can’t deal with it. On one hand, I hate seeing the shiny reflection of my grays in every mirror, but on the other hand I’m like “f- it. I’m going to be 40 in 6 weeks. This is par for the course.” Mind you I’m saying this with a hair appt 4 days away, lol
They eyeshadow! Yassss!! I don’t know the appropriate brushes, for sure. And I know this is super sad but I literally only put one color on per application. Because I SUCK at blending. I have the UD2 Naked Mini Palette and and can’t figure out how to incorporate 2 colors for the life of me!
Just turned 42. So far the grey (actually white) is limited to one temple and a few scattered strands. If I wear my hair curly, you only see it at my temple. I tried demi-permanent color/gloss at the salon once and very few of the white hairs were actually tinted. So I think I’m just going to let it go. The issue is that the rest of my hair (dark blonde) has a lot of natural yellow tones. My hairstylist said that maybe once I get to 25%, she could start toning the rest.