With the new Tarte LipSurgence Lip Crèmes on my lips today, I’m feeling Empowered…
I live for picnics…
The fun in the sun, the food, the friends, the family, the food…
Did I already mention the food?
I might actually love picnic fare more than I love brunch, and you know how much I love brunch.
It’s because of the sides, man! I’m all about the sides. The potato salad, macaroni salad, fruit salad, that weird Jello salad that one of my aunties usually makes which looks totally gross but tastes hella delicious.
Oh! — and the corn on the freaking cob?
I wants it… I wants it all.
Speaking of picnics (how’s that for a lazy transition, ha!), there’s one happening now at Tarte, and it’s new for summer 2015.
Say “Please pass the potato chips!” to the Tarte Poppy Picnic Amazonian Clay Eye & Cheek Palette ($38)
What is it?
A $38 limited edition eye & cheek palette (available now) containing six new powder eyeshadows and one re-promoted powder blush (it’s called Glisten) containing Tarte’s jam, otherwise known as Amazonian clay, which is supposed to soak up any oily bits while simultaneously balancing moisture levels in your skin.
Are there any limited edition shades?
Yes, ma’am, there are. The eyeshadows in Summer Breeze (a matte cream), Sweet Tea (a matte tan), Ice Cream Cone (a matte chocolate), Barefoot in the Grass (a matte light tan), Peach Poppy (a matte peach) and Picnic Basket (a matte deep brown) are all limited edition.
What size are the pans?
Shimmery golden pink Glisten Blush is a 0.20-ounce full-size pan, and the eyeshadows are smaller at 0.06 ounces each.
What can you tell me about the texture of the eyeshadows?
Well, I can tell ya that they kick up a lot of powder, so it helps to tap off your brush before applying them; otherwise, you get a little fallout.
Beyond that, though, they feel smooth to me, and they’re easy to blend.
Are the eyeshadows pigmented or sheer?
I’d say that the lighter tan and peach shades are sheer to medium, while the two darkest shades are medium (I built them up for the swatches to make ’em nice and dark), and none of them look heavy on the skin.
How about the texture of the blush?
Slightly grainy…which is probably because of the pretty big flecks of golden glitter in it.
How pigmented is the blush?
Moderately pigmented, but not crazy town/crazy clown pigmented. I only need a single layer.
When you hear the word “tartelette” do you think of tiny, tasty tarts?
Because I do.
And I don’t just think of one of them. I think of dozens of them in different flavors, but I don’t think that’s terribly unusual. I mean, who’s going to eat just one tart, right? CRAZY PEOPLE, that’s who. I would eat five or six of them and just rapid fire toss them into my mouth without even taking a breath, because that’s how I roll…
The term, “Tartelette,” as I’m unsuccessfully trying to use it here, is actually the name of a new all-matte 12-pan neutral eyeshadow palette from Tarte.
It’s also what Tarte calls their fans. So no, a Tartelette is not a tiny tart (or is it?); nor is it a backup singer for a band, even though that totally sounds like a legit thing (“And now, give a warm welcome to Karen and the Tartelettes, YAAAY!!”).
I wore the Tartelette palette a lot over the holidays because the colors, being neutral and matte, are perfect for family time, and I could wear them around my parents without having to answer questions like, “Why are you dressed like you’re going to the disco?”
Also highly recommended for watching Shark Tank with your in-laws (OMG! You haven’t lived until you’ve sat through four hours of Shark Tank with your in-laws.), going back for thirds at dinner, and going to brunch with your nieces and nephews — you know, just the regular, everyday family stuff that doesn’t require false lashes and red lips.
Step away from the lip pencil!
Don’t worry. You’re not gonna need it with new Tarte LipSurgence Lip Gloss in Envy ($19), even though I thought I would when I saw the tube.
Turns out I didn’t.
Mauve-ish berry Envy, a limited edition gloss in Tarte’s 2014 fall collection and the latest gal to join Team Tarte LipSurgence, is filled to the brim with antioxidants and moisturizing ingredients, and it’s supposed to push your fine lip lines and wrinkles out of the picture.
The color looks much deeper and more intense in the tube than it does on my lips, where it applies quite sheer.
Actually, all of the LipSurgence Glosses are like that. Natural-looking lip color is the name of their game. Tarte purposefully dialed back the pigment to make sure that some of your natural lip luster peeks through.
Tarte’s new cruelty-free Colored Clay Tinted Brow Gel ($21) comes in three shades, and the one we’re looking at today, Taupe, is actually nowhere near my natural brow color. It’s the lightest of the three shades, and the one best suited for blondes.
Buuut, I thought I might be able to use it for the inner part of my brows to do that whole ombre brow thing, or when I just feel like wearing my Lil’ Kim/Nicki Minaj wig to scare the UPS guy.
Good times, my friend… Good times.
Just to see how it would look, I also pulled the color all the way through my brown to the outer tail, and HOLY WOW MAMA! — this stuff is unbelievably pigmented.
Despite it being way too light for me to use as my primary brow gel, Taupe still completely covers Raul, also known as “the bald spot in my left brow.”
Taupe also keeps my stray hairs from flapping in the wind and has so much pigment that it even lightens the overall color of my dark brunette brows by several shades (only while I wear it, of course).
Kind of shocking, considering that the tiny brush, which doesn’t look like much, has bristles so small that they look like they wouldn’t be able to hold much product at all.
“No frickin’ way,” I thought the first time I saw it, but it works, both the brush and the gel. Together, they fill in all the sparse spots, lay down plenty of color (on the hairs and the skin), and corral those wayward hairs into place.
It’s a firm, yet manageable hold, and I can still run a brush through my brows when the gel dries down if I want to, so the hold isn’t as firm or stiff as, say, Anastasia’s Clear Brow Gel, which could hold those hairs down through a category 5 storm, I kid you not.
But it is firm enough to hold the hairs in place when I dance in front of my Beyonce fan. #truestory #dontjudge