I’m sitting here in the living room eating popcorn and watching the fifth season of Friday Night Lights, and Tabs is nowhere to be found. I think he turned in early, totally tuckered out after the rollicking weekend he had.
He didn’t party in the traditional sense, but he did host a couple of parties — or rather I did, seeing as how I take care of that kind of thing for him as his professional pet assistant/lackey.
Let me just say this: if I never see another catnip cocktail in my entire life, it’ll be too soon.
I’m sure he’ll be down for dinner… Tabs hasn’t missed a dinner in, um, ever. He better hurry, though, because I don’t know how much longer I’ll be awake.
I may try to coax him downstairs with cookie dough… Seriously, it’s the weirdest thing. Whenever I bake cookies and bust out one of those tubes of Toll House cookie dough, Tabs comes runnin’. I don’t know if it’s the crinkling of the packaging or the scent of the dough, but he stands up on his hind legs at the kitchen counters, meows and flashes his sad eyes like he’s saying, “Please, miss, can you spare a cookie? I’m so very hungry.”
Yeah, right! We all know that’s B.S., as evidenced by his No. 1 ranking from the Association of Plus Size Kitty Supermodels, and it doesn’t look like he’s going to lose that ranking anytime soon, not with busy modeling weeks like this one. Here are some of the campaigns he did…
Who is Tabs the Cat? About five years ago I befriended a stray, flea-bitten tabby cat with a bad case of worms. I could see he’d fallen on hard times, but his profound knowledge of high fashion and department store cosmetics led me to believe that he was more than meets the eye. We became fast friends, and now he’s actually my boss (and a successful kitty model).
Your friendly neighborhood beauty addict,
P.S. To learn more about my extremely demanding, finicky employer, plus-size kitty supermodel Tabs, you can check out the archives here.