I guess it’s safe to discuss now that the tests are over and we’re just waiting on the results. From NASA.
I couldn’t mention anything about it before because of a non-disclosure agreement, but Tabs is one of five feline finalists to become commander of NASA’s next mission to Mars. Yup, I went with him this weekend down to NASA’s Jet Propulsion Laboratory at the California Institute of Technology where they ran him and the other finalists through a barrage of tests. Gravy deprivation, zero-gravity mousing, a cat obstacle course with animatronic guard dogs, and puzzles to test problem solving skills.
He did well in the obstacle course, passed the puzzles (in one, the instructors left a door slightly ajar, and the cats were monitored to see if they could paw it open) and cleaned up in the zero-gravity mousing test, coming in first among the five kitties.
But he came in dead last in the gravy deprivation test (of course)…
I hope his overall scores were good enough to keep him in the running, though, because it’s been years since I’ve seen Tabs want something as much as he wants this. To be a part of the first feline mission to Mars would be a huge honor. Not only has Tabs always wanted to be an astrocat, but as he put it, “My being on this mission would mean so much to future feline generations.” Seeing a one-time stray cat rise to international stardom as a plus-size kitty supermodel before walking on the surface of Mars? It would send a message to millions of strays and house cats around the world that anything is possible, and not even the sky is the limit anymore.
Luckily, Tabs had a pretty light week of kitty modeling so he had time to focus on his NASA training regimen, but he did work on a few campaigns…
And here are the highlights (linger on the Maybelline ad for a second or two).
Who is Tabs the Cat? About five years ago I befriended a stray, flea-bitten tabby cat with a bad case of worms. I could see he’d fallen on hard times, but his profound knowledge of high fashion and department store cosmetics led me to believe that he was more than meets the eye. We became fast friends, and now he’s actually my boss (and a successful kitty model).
Your friendly neighborhood beauty addict,
P.S. To learn more about my employer, world-renowned plus-size kitty supermodel (and hopeful astrocat) Tabs, you can also peruse the archives here.