Did homegirl just quote Frozen? She sure did. Can you blame her (me), though? My primary source of social interaction is a toddler, LOL!
“Let it go” isn’t just a song lyric. It’s also a gentle reminder for both you and me to just let the little things go, a.k.a. not sweating the small stuff.
That’s hard for me — not getting too frustrated about all of the little annoyances that happen throughout the day. I’ve been diligently working on it for a month, and it’s been…a challenge, to say the least. I have to keep working on it, but so far, at least, the effort has done a lot for my spirit. I just want to take more things in stride, ya know? — but it’s hard to remember that there are many things I don’t have control over (like people, and some circumstances).
You know how it is… The only thing we really have control over is how we react. ?♀️
Case in point, last night I was on hold on the phone for — I kid you not — a full hour trying to sort out a situation with Connor’s school pictures. There was a snafu with the ordering, and what I thought was going to save me time ultimately ended up taking A LOT more time to straighten out.
While I was on hold, my shoulders grew increasingly more tense, and my jaw clenched tighter. I started to run through a mental checklist of questions and answers that went a little something like this…
- What about this situation is bugging me so much? Answer: That I’m wasting so much time, and also a decent amount of money.
- Do I have control over how long I’m having to wait on hold? Answer: I don’t. I just have to keep waiting until I can speak to someone who can hopefully help me sort things out.
- Does being angry right now make my life better in any way? Answer: No. It just makes me even MORE stressed.
- Will being crabby toward the person on the other end of the phone make me feel any better in the long run or help me get back my lost time? Answer: No.
- Do I have control over how I react in this situation? Answer: I do. I can either let this ruin my evening, or I can take it in stride, do what I have to do, and move on.
You get the picture.
It’s fascinating to me that there are people out there who just do this naturally, because I have to REALLY work at it.
It’s such a cliche, but it’s also true. We really don’t have control over many of life’s annoyances, just like we don’t have control over how other people treat us throughout the day, and for me, it is a struggle to be chill, because I’m so not chill, but I’m working on it… I find that the more I closely I watch my breathing, and the more attention I pay to how I’m feeling, like when I ask myself questions in situations I’m bothered by, the better and less stressed I feel.
Your friendly neighborhood beauty addict,
Karen
FaeFrau says
Although it may appear that people do this naturally, it’s a practice, so it’s okay if you struggle with it.
Also, I find that, once I notice I’m reacting or struggling with anything, and this is especially helpful when you don’t feel self-conscious (e.g., you’re on the phone or where no one is looking), just smile; even if you don’t feel it underneath, make the face do it. It relaxes the face (because it takes less muscles to smile than to frown) and it somehow takes the edge off. You’ll be in a less reactive state of mind and feel almost positive.
You made it to Friday! 🙂
Karen says
I do that sometimes. 🙂 It’s a version of “fake it ’til you make it,” and it works for me!
Happy Friday to you!
Suzanne C says
I struggle with this, also. This past year, dealing with our homeowner’s insurance and mortgage companies, has been a constant exercise in patience, one that I sometimes failed miserably. I just try to practice “Do unto others…”. Although I have to admit, there have been times when the effort of not blowing up at some of the people I’ve dealt with has been more stressful than dealing with the idiots themselves, lol.
Michele DiCola says
Ditto FaeFrau
I smile and under dire stress I really do count my blessings .
It sounds very trite but it puts me to sleep ?
Christina says
I can relate to that. I constantly struggle with the things that don’t work out as planned. When I look back at the past month and what happened, I could cry. Unfortunately that leads to sleeping problems and nothing improves the situation. My intention for the future is, not to make long-term plans, but take every day and situation as it comes.
Anne says
Definitely not something that comes naturally to me either, but I agree: It makes a huge difference.