Section: Product Reviews

The Urban Decay Naked Ultimate Basics Eyeshadow Palette

Published in: Eyes, Makeup, Palettes, Product Reviews, Urban Decay

Meanwhile, eight eyeshadows later…

I don’t even know how this happened.

OMG!

I started with two neutral browns from the new $55 Urban Decay Naked Ultimate Basics Palette, which is a new holiday palette from UD (you can sign up to find out when it’ll be available), but then 45 minutes had gone by and I’d burned through almost the entire greatest hits album from The Cure.

urban decay naked ultimate basics

The $55 Urban Decay Naked Ultimate Basics Eyeshadow Palette

I fell into the Eye Makeup Black Hole, which happens to me periodically…and by “periodically,” I mean all the damned time.

But isn’t that always the way it is with these Urban Decay Naked Palettes? You go in fully intending to do a simple look with just two of the shadows, but lo and behold — POOF! — there went half the day.

Or is that just something I do? A lot?

urban decay naked ultimate basics

The Urban Decay Naked Ultimate Basics Palette

It’s been six years since the original Naked Palette dropped like the bikinis and briefs on a nude beach, and UD is still playing with the brown/beige/taupe theme. This one’s all about those neutral matte powder shadows.

Well…most of them are matte. There is one highlighting shadow that does have some very subtle shimmer (which was a brilliant addition, BTW!).

urban decay naked ultimate basics

A closer look at the eyeshadows…

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Righteous Red Kat Von D Beauty Everlasting Liquid Lipstick in Project Chimps

Published in: Kat Von D, Lips, Makeup, Product Reviews

kat von d project chimps

NOTE: If you ever wear gorgeous matte red Kat Von D Beauty Everlasting Liquid Lipstick in Project Chimps, please try to rein in your compulsive urge to rub your lips together…

Because I wore this limited edition $20 lippie to run some errands yesterday (Target for canned goods and some baby stuff and Trader Joe’s for groceries), and at some point between leaving the house, running my errands and returning home, I must have rubbed my lips together, because I had red smudged all around my pout and effectively looked like the freakin’ Joker.

DUDE! It was like Halloween had arrived waaaaay too early.

But at least I know now why the Target clerk was looking at me funny when I smiled at him… Haha!

The worst part, though, was that El Hub was with me the entire time and didn’t say a damned thing!

I don’t know if he was secretly laughing on the inside, or if he’s just so used to me looking like a crazy person…

The jury’s still out on that one.

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Paul & Joe Makeup Collection “A”

Published in: Collections, Makeup, Paul & Joe, Product Reviews

paul joe makeup collection a lipstick

Paul & Joe Lipstick A (025) from the new $100 Paul & Joe Makeup Collection A

Believe it or not, I do NOT own a bejeweled pimp cup.

Shocker, I know. 🙂

But if I did, I would raise it high and proudly to Paul & Joe for giving us 20 years of cat lady cosmetics catnip.

That’s 20 years of CCL domination, y’all!

paul joe makeup collection a all

The $100 Paul & Joe Beaute Makeup Collection A

To celebrate this meow-worthy occasion, the purveyors of kitty makeup purr-fection curated the Paul & Joe Beaute Makeup Collection A (a $100 set).

It’s a limited edition box containing their bestselling makeup products…but I’m most excited about the tote it comes with because it FOLDS INTO A CAT HEAD.

I mean, I JUST CAN’T EVEN. WITH THE EARS!?

paul joe makeup collection a cat tote 1

The kitty tote!?

It’s big, too, and has more than enough room for all kinds of cat lady shinanigans and those tubes of Paul & Joe lipstick with the cat heads that you just can’t bear to use because they’re so darned cute.

paul joe makeup collection a cat tote 2

The kitty tote, unfolded

Oh, and yeah, there’s also makeup in the collection, like a powder blush (a light coral pink with a silver sheen), a cream lipstick (a creamy, semi-sheer pink) and a pressed powder compact (a light beige powder and a shimmery beige highlighter).

Everything is full size and, because we’re talking about Paul & Joe here, adorable.

Paul & Joe Face Color A in Cheerful Tulip (39) from the new Makeup Collection A

Paul & Joe Face Color A in Cheerful Tulip (39) from the Paul & Joe Makeup Collection A

But are they, ya know, good?

Yes, I think so. Pretty good. Keep in mind, though, that Paul & Joe is geared toward the casual makeup enthusiast — at least that’s always been my perception — so if you’re a stickler for the finer technical aspects of professional makeup performance, then these products might not live up to those expectations.

Take the blush, for instance. I like how sheer and natural it looks on my cheeks, especially in natural light and in pics, but when I wear it and see myself in flourescent lighting, I think my pores look kinda big… Perhaps due to the sheen (it could be a touch finer), but then again, I could also just chill-the-eff out. 🙂 Like, if I didn’t know anything about blush, I’d probably just think it looked pretty and I’d like it.

paul joe makeup collection a bag

The bag…

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:)

The NARS Audacious Collection for Fall 2016, and Apoline, My New Favorite Pink Lip

Published in: Collections, Makeup, NARS, Product Reviews

nars audacious collection

The five new NARS Audacious Lipsticks from the Audacious Collection

François, homeboy, I know you’re busy — what with selling your Bora Bora island and working to create the best lipglosses on the planet — so you’ve got, like, NO spare time, but couldn’t you have squeezed in a few minutes to name one of your five new Audacious Lipsticks “Karen”?

I mean, it’s not like I’m asking you to get a prison tattoo of my face on your forearm. ALL I WANT IS A LIPSTICK NAMED KAREN.

Is that too much to ask?

nars audacious collection lipsticks

The five new NARS Audacious Lipsticks from top to bottom in Apoline, Mona, Kate, Stefania and Shirley

I’m not the only Karen, and I suspect that most of us would love to have our name on our very own Audacious Lipstick. I imagine that having one would feel really great, like discovering that you’ve been made an honorary member of Salt ‘n’ Pepa and En Vogue.

This time around, Apoline, Shirley, Stefania, Kate and Mona get the honor, and they’re part of the new NARS Audacious Fall Collection, which launched August 15 at NARS boutiques and the NARS website and arrives September 1 to Sephora.

I’d lipsticks could talk, I’d ask these, “Why are you so creamy and opaque? Why don’t you ever settle into my fine lines? WHY DO I LOVE YOU SO MUCH?”

From this batch, I’m all about Apoline (the pink rose) and Stefania (the deep fuchsia), because they’re pink, and I’m predictable that way, haha.

But I also think that Shirley (the crimson), Kate (the purple orchid) and Mona (the mahogany) are pretty, too.

The NARS Audacious Collection also includes a completely new line of potted brow creams called…the Brow Defining Creams.

Available in four colors, they feel drier than a MAC Fluidline Brow Gelcreme to me and are slightly less pigmented, but in this case, I don’t think that’s a bad thing, because if I had a dollar for every time I tried a product like these and accidentally “Instagram browed” myself beyond oblivion, I’d have enough money to buy that Bora Bora island from François myself.

I usually steer clear of brow products like these for that reason — because of how intense they usually are — but these are just pigmented enough to fill in the sparse spots without leaving my brows looking heavy or overdone. The results look very natural, which makes me want to kiss François on both cheeks. 🙂

They’re $23 each and available in Sonoran (a blonde), El Djouf (a light brown), Tanami (an auburn) and Danakil (a dark brown).

nars brow defining cream

The NARS Brow Defining Creams from the top to bottom in Sonoran, Tanami, El Djouf and Danakil

There are also two new dark, pigmented Unrestricted Eyeliner Stylo liquid liners. Both are black and $27, but one has a matte finish and the other is satin.

The only thing is, I’m a flexible felt tip gal, and these have a stiff tip, so my lines end up with shaky, mousey, unsure edges, and I prefer my lines to say, “If need be, I will cut a b*tch.”

nars unrestricted eyeliner stylo

NARS Unrestricted Eyeliner Stylo in Matte and Satin

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Too Cool for School Artify Max in Pocket Lip Balm

Published in: Collections, Lips, Makeup, Product Reviews, Too Cool for School

too cool for school artify max in pocket 1

$12 Too Cool for School Artify Max in Pocket Lip Balms in #1 Kiss Kiss (top) and #2 Pink Pink (bottom)

“Girl, you are lookin’ FLY today in those dope-@ss earrings.”

These are the new $12 Artify Max in Pocket Lip Balms from Too Cool for School. They’re available in three shades, and the one I’m wearing is #2 Pink Pink.

too cool for school artify max in pocket k2

HAAAAY

I wore these everywhere yesterday, and I got SO MANY compliments on my jewelry…

Haha, totally kidding. 🙂 But far be it from me to deny one’s inner diva urges to over-accessorize. I LIVE to over-accessorize.

Cute in a “DAMN, is that cat rockin’ a monobrow?!” sort of way, the Too Cool for School Artify Max In Pocket Lip Balms are actually lip glosses.

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Too Cool for School Artify Max in Pocket Lip Balms in #1 Kiss Kiss (top) and #2 Pink Pink (bottom)

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