Raul. You @sshole. You just don’t get it, do you? This isn’t working out.
I mean, what else is there to say? I’ve been putting up with your nonsense for six years. The taunting in the mirror every morning — “Ooh, look at me!” — the following me to work.
I kept telling myself, “Come on, Karen, he’s just a bald spot in the arch of your left eyebrow. Give him another chance.”
But that’s just it. You’re always IN MY FACE!
And I’m sick of it.
You need to move on. Go find someone else’s eyebrows to torment.
I don’t want to see you anymore when I look in the mirror. I don’t want to see that bald spot there in my left brow.
Just leave. I’ve taken care of everything. You won’t even have to lift a brow.
I’ve actually been seeing someone new…Urban Decay’s recently revamped $29 Brow Box (available in two shades, Brown Sugar and Honey Pot), and he takes care of my brows.
He’s a two-tiered box containing everything I need to fill in sparse spots like you and fatten skinny brows — two powder shadows (which can be mixed to customize a color); a soft, colorless wax to herd stray hairs and set them in place; as well as two brushes and a tiny tweezers.
To relax, which I need because of you, I’ve been wearing Brown Sugar in my brows on casual days. With the powders, brows don’t look quite as crisp as they do with brow pencils, and UD’s wax only has light hold, so my brows don’t look lacquered into place, but that works for me. It’s comfy, like a broken-in white t-shirt — soft, casual and totally laid-back.
Raul, just stop. I know you’re not listening anymore. I can see you peeking through the powder/wax combo after five or six hours into my day.
You are one stubborn brow bald spot… I’ll give you that.
But you should know that the Brow Box also comes with tools, which are great for on-the-go touch-ups. Being tiny, they aren’t the best brushes for my mornings, but I’ll just use my regular-sized brushes for that.
Let’s be classy about this, Raul, and keep it amicable. None of that, “I’ll be back business, mwhahaha!” It’s been real.
AVAILABILITY: Coming soon to Urban Decay counters and available now at urbandecay.com
MAKEUP AND BEAUTY BLOG RATING: B
Your friendly neighborhood beauty addict,