In an ominous dream I had the other night, Olympic Skater Johnny Weir warned me that I was making a big mistake…
In the dream he told me two things — 1) that I didn’t have enough sequins in my wardrobe and 2) that I wasn’t wearing bronzer often enough.
I had to agree with him about the bling…
By nature, I love to sparkle. So I’m totally on board with that.
But about Johnny’s second bit of advice, I hrrumphed!
“Duuuuude,” I screamed from my dream seat next to the rink, “I wear bronzer a lot. Like all the time!”
He landed a triple axle and yelled from across the ice, “Don’t lie. I saw you at Kate Spade yesterday, and you looked tow’ up. What you need is a good golden tan bronzer. The warm, healthy glow could do you some good.”
Then he skated up to me, pulled the white scrunchie I was wearing from my hair (I never figured out why), and skated off until he disappeared into a hot pink fog…
(Yeah, I really have to stop eating those rice crispy treats before bed.)
This was one of those dreams I initially forgot about but remembered later in the day.
It was Saturday, warm and sunny outside, but I was feeling pretty crummy about being stuck indoors doing my taxes. At the time I was wearing my rattiest pajamas with a scrunchie in my hair (yes, it was white) and didn’t have on a lick of makeup.
I’d just glanced over at my pan of Physicians Formula Sexy Booster Sexy Glow Bronzer sitting on my desk when the dream occurred to me and I blurted, “Johnny Weir!”
The golden bronzer is part of a new spring collection of products designed to increase yo’ sex appeal.
Mica, Diisostearyl Malate, Synthetic Fluorphlogopite, Fragrance, Synthetic Wax, Nylon-12, Silica, Ethylhexyl Palmitate, Magnesium Stearate, Ethylhexyl Isononanoate, Lauroyl Lysine, Kaolin, Epimedium Sagittatum Leaf / Stem Extract, Theobroma Cacao (Cocoa) Fruit Powder, Dimethicone / Methicone Copolymer, Androstadienone, Pregnadienol, Ethylhexylglycerin, Phenoxyethanol. May Contain: Iron Oxides, Iron Oxides, Red 30, Tin Oxide, Titanium Dioxide, Yellow 5 Lake
“It must be a sign,” I reckoned, closing the Excel spreadsheet I was working on.
I grabbed a big, fluffy brush, swirled it in the pan of shimmery gold and tan powders, and swept the mix all over my face.
“May be worn alone or over makeup. Blend shades together and brush on powder evenly over face and neck for a sexy bronze glow. For best results on dry to very dry skin, apply moisturizer prior to using bronzer.”
The tiny flecks of shimmer, which are shiny, but not overly so, gave a soft radiance to my face, and the warm golden tan powder perked up my sallow skin without turning it orange or muddy.
And just like that, I felt about a million times better! Thanks to Johnny Weir.
PRICE: $13.95 (available in two varieties, bronzer and light bronzer)
AVAILABILITY: Available now at drugstores and also online
MAKEUP AND BEAUTY BLOG RATING: A
Your friendly neighborhood beauty addict,