A few years ago on a girl’s spa day up in Napa with my friends Jen and Cindy, I decided to live a little and try something different — something other than a massage or facial.
I had a mud bath.
And it was absolutely, positively the most disgusting thing I’ve ever done.
No, it wasn’t the dirt. I’m totally OK with dirt. Mud too. I have no problem getting dirty. I went into it expecting something relaxing, like a massive Glam Glow mask for my entire body.
Little did I know…
When we got to the spa, everything was hunky-dory until they took me to the room with the mud baths.
Uh…where’s my private room? I wondered. Where’s my tub?
Instead of there being a single tub in a private room, all of the mud baths were in a huge open space, all lined up in industrial rows.
There were also ladies in the tubs, and more ladies waiting for their turn, so we were all just standing there — buck naked and awkward — for, oh, 10 minutes or so (did I mention it was awkward?), until it was our turn.
At that point, the spa technicians kicked three women out of the tubs they were in and plopped us in their places.
Sooooo…the mud wasn’t fresh.
Yeah, I don’t know why, but I’d assumed they’d empty the tubs after each person, and refill them with new mud for the next.
Is that crazy? I mean, I guess dirt is dirt and all, but whatever — it grossed me out. The entire time I was sitting in that tub, I kept thinking of all the naked people who’d been there before me, and all of the strands of body hair and wayward bits of poo floating around…
Who knows how long they’d been using that same mud. It could’ve been weeks or months or YEARS!
Looking back on it, I probably should have said, “NO ACTUALLY I’LL PASS! I’M GOOD! I’LL JUST WAIT HERE!” But I was overwhelmed by the grossness of it all and couldn’t stop myself before I was completely immersed in the mud, and by that point, it wasn’t easy to get out.
That mud was hot and encumbering. Difficult to move around in. And then my claustrophobia kicked in, and I couldn’t breathe. To make matters worse, I was sitting facing a wall that was covered with these really scary masks, and I couldn’t look to either side — mostly out of shock, but also because it might seem like I was ogling the other naked women in the tubs next to me.
IT WAS THE MOST DISGUSTING 20 MINUTES OF MY LIFE!
Lesson learned here: opt for the massage or facial.
What’s the most disgusting thing you’ve ever done in the name of beauty?
Your friendly neighborhood beauty addict,