Dear Tabby is written by Tabs the Cat, commonly regarded as “the world’s first plus-size kitty supermodel.” Founded in mid 2012, it has quickly become the most widely syndicated cat advice column on earth — known for its fresh, feline perspective on lifestyle, fashion and style issues affecting cats and humans.
A red carpet quandary
DEAR TABBY: Exciting news, Tabby! Last night I found out that a film I recently worked on, 300: Rise of an Empire, is going to have a big red carpet premiere IN HOLLYWOOD, and I’m going to walk the red carpet!
As you may have guessed, I work in the film industry — but not as a cat actor or anything. I’m more of a behind-the-scenes kitty, primarily working in security (I hunt rodents on the set).
I’ve been doing it a few years, but this will be the first major event I’ve attended.
I’m a little nervous because I have absolutely no idea what to wear! Would a glitter-encrusted collar be appropriate? With or without bells? Or should it be something more subtle? I don’t want to stick out like a sore paw.
—Hapless in Hollywood
DEAR HAPLESS: How funny! I’m actually going to be at that same event! One of the fight choreographers on the new 300 also worked with me on Spider Tabs. If you see me there, please come up and introduce yourself. I would love to meet you.
As for your question, for red carpet events, I generally stick to classic kitty wear. Collars with simple lines and elegant touches in neutral shades like black or beige, coupled with a few tasteful details like diamonds and/or Swarovorski crystals, always works. Simple and timeless. Something like that would still look good 50 years from now.
Not that there’s anything wrong with current trends like a brightly colored glittery collar. That could totally look fierce. If you’re sure you can pull it off, go for it, but if you have any doubts at all, classic always works. You don’t want to end up on somebody’s Worst Dressed List (remember the Bjork swan dress?).
I have a litmus test when it comes to my event outfits. If it looks like something a cat James Bond would wear, do it. Hasn’t failed me yet (knock on wood!).
One last tip: if you can, book an appointment way in advance with a professional fur stylist for the day of the event. I’m paws-itive you could handle your own styling, but having a pro take care of it for you means one less thing to worry about.
A cat in pursuit of a lifelong dream
DEAR TABBY: I’ve decided to pursue my lifelong dream of competing as a professional kitty bodybuilder, and I remembered reading in your World’s Sexiest Cat interview for People magazine that you adhere to a strict diet and workout regimen when you’re preparing for major roles. Do you think I should start growing my own organic cat grass and juicing, or should I cut my carbs and increase protein from seafood? I’m not sure where to start. What foods work best for you when you’re bulking up for a role? And what are your favorite exercises?
—Fitness Fan in Florida
DEAR FITNESS: Congrats for pursuing your dream! That first step is always the toughest.
As for nutrition, well, when I have to bulk up for a role, my personal trainer ups my gravy and protein intake — especially turkey. In addition to plyometric exercises (lots of jumping), I do a lot of yoga to prepare myself mentally and help with focus. It’s always important, but even more so when you’re competing. Eye of the tiger and all, you know.
Keep me posted on your progress, and don’t forget to take some before and after pics. Perhaps you’ll send me a ticket to your first pro event? Hint-hint. I’d love to go.
An appropriate gift for a host family?
DEAR TABBY: I work as a medical researcher, and I’m conducting a study on Japan’s cat cafe culture — specifically any relationship between cat cafes and lowered stress levels in humans. Next fall I head overseas to live and work in Japan, and when I first arrive, I’ll be staying with a host family, with whom I’ll be living until I acclimate and find a place of my own.
I’d very much like to bring them some kind of small present, something to say “thank you for welcoming me into your home.” What do you suggest?
—Traveling Researcher in Riverside
DEAR TRAVELING: That’s very thoughtful and classy of you. A small token sets the stage for a smooth visit.
I’ve stayed with host families overseas a number of times, and I always like bringing gourmet cat treats from home — things my hosts may not have easy access to over there.
What about swinging by your favorite artisanal catnip shop before you leave, or do you know of anyplace near you that makes organic, locally-sourced kitty treats? Once you’ve decided on a gift, wrapping it up makes it a little more practical and special. Your hosts will be able to re-purpose a ribbon, say, and be able to play with it after they finish the treats.
Oh, and don’t forget the thank you card!
Your friendly neighborhood beauty addicts,
Karen and Tabs
P.S. I had a blast with you in The Walking Dead Twitter party tonight. Thanks for keeping me company during the show. I still haven’t completely recovered from that scene with Rick about Carl, and I’m not sure I ever will. HOLY LOSING YOUR SH*T, BATMAN!
What a great show!!!