The new LORAC Pro Blushes, $20 each; available now at Sephora
I sat down this morning intending to dish about the new LORAC Pro Powder Cheek Stains (5-second overview: fan-frickin’-tastic! Super pigmented, and yet easy to blend and surprisingly natural looking for something with an 8-hour wear time), but I just haven’t been able to concentrate…
All five of the new LORAC Pro Powder Cheek Stains clockwise from the lower left: Coral Crush, Petal Pink, Plum Passion, Rosy Glow and Ruby Rouge
Coral Crush, Petal Pink, Plum Passion, Rosy Glow and Ruby Rouge
My mind keeps wandering thousands of miles away…to my mom. She and my dad are visiting family in the Philippines right now, and I haven’t seen them in more than two months.
I’ve always lived within driving distance of them, so it’s weird being this far away for so long.
Me and my mom on Mother’s Day last May
Late last night Mom emailed to tell me that her mom, my grandmother, passed away over the weekend…
I posted a picture of her earlier this year. She was one of my glam grannies, the one who went to fashion school.
I didn’t know her very well because I was still a baby when my parents and I left the Philippines.
There were some letters and cards over the years, but my only clear memory of her was from the one time we met as adults. It was on a trip that my mom and I took to the Philippines in 2000.
Wow…I can’t believe that was 12 years ago.
I remember us driving out to the countryside, or “the province,” as my mom would say, and spending the afternoon with her family.
They prepared a huge lunch for us, and while we ate and chatted as best we could, with me not understanding the dialect spoken by my mom’s side of the family very well, my grandmother told us stories about my mom as a kid.
My granny was a tiny woman, small but tough, with a smile that lit up the room. When I met her, even though her face was lined with wrinkles, she was such a beauty.
This was way out in a rural part of the country, far from Manila, where the chickens, which are always running around everywhere, probably outnumber the people, LOL!
At one point, my aunt asked me if I wanted a glass of fresh coconut juice, to which I nodded enthusiastically, and the next thing I knew, someone was climbing a tree outside, and my aunt was hacking open a coconut with a machete and pouring the juice into a glass!
Talk about being a long, long way from the San Francisco Bay Area…
I remember leaving the province that day after lunch and thinking about how nice my grandma seemed. I wish that time and distance had made it easier for us to get to know each other better.
She was regarded as the best dressmaker in her village and was always immaculately dressed from head to toe. I find myself wondering about random things, like what her stance on asymmetrical hemlines was, what her favorite modern day fashion designs were, and which Project Runway designers she thought had the most talent (yup, they watch a lot of the same shows we do).
Even though we never got to know each other very well, I’m sad. More for my mom, though. I can’t imagine how she must feel.
My heart aches when I think that someday I’ll no longer have my mommy around…
As you can see, I’m feeling a bit mushy today. If I haven’t told you lately, thank you. Thanks for always being there and for listening.
Your friendly neighborhood beauty addict,
Karen
P.S. We’ll talk a little bit more about the New LORAC Pro Powder Cheek Stains soon…
Ankita@corallista says
I’m really sorry your grandmother passed away. I’ve had the good fortune of knowing and being raised by my grandmothers on both sides of the family. Don’t worry about your Mum, she is surrounded by loved ones and I’m sure they are taking care of each other. I hope you feel better soon.
varsha says
Karen,I don’t comment quite often,but I read all your posts and it cheers me up all the time.You are this very bright positive person spreading you warmth around.I am so sorry for your loss and I pray your grand mom’s soul rest in peace.On the bright side,you always have your mom around near you,unlike some of us.So once she is back ,give her a even tighter hug and treasure more the time you spend with her..:)
I hope you feel little better soon 🙂
Fieran says
Aww hun..I’m so sorry to hear about your wonderful grandma. It’s good that your Mom is there though.
The worst part about being an adult is accepting mortality. Living 6000 miles away from my parents, I worry that I’ll be unable to do anything for my parents when they are older. I’m terrified that I won’t be around for them.
Kayla says
So sorry to hear about your loss Karen. It sounds like your grandmother was a beautiful lady inside and out. I’m sure she’ll always have a special place in you and your mother’s heart. Feel better please. xox
Nina says
Karen, im so sorry for your and your family’s loss. Grandmas are a special thing and your grandma is right up there in the ranks. Tell your Mom to hang in there, and you too. 🙂
Joanna says
My condolences to you and your family! My thought and prayers goes out to you and your mom.
Ella says
Heartfelt condolences to you and your family, Ate Karen. May your Grandma’s soul rest in peace. She’s so blessed to have lived a full life. Please feel better soon..
hugs&kisses
Soo Jin says
Oh Karen, I’m so sorry for your loss. I’ll be praying for you and your family!
Karen says
I appreciate the prayers, Soo Jin. You’re very kind!
kimkats says
Aw, Karen… I’m so sorry for the loss of your grandma…. May she rest in peace – sounds like she had a wonderful life, and we know she has a lovely granddaughter. Keep the sweet memories of her alive – that way, she will never really be gone..
Hugs to you – feel better soon.
Kim
Karen says
Hugs back to you, Kimkats. And thank you for this note.
DLAOKC says
Karen, I’m so sorry for the loss of your grandmother. Aren’t we lucky and thankful for the wonderful heritage we have! Obviously you and your sylish grandmother shared some genes!
Karen says
We’re so lucky, DLAOKC. 🙂
Carrie says
I’m so sorry to read that your grandmother passed away. The pictures you posted of her are stunning. She looks particularly beautiful in that yellow dress. You resemble her quite a bit. All my best wishes to you and your family at this difficult time.
Sugarenia says
Losing grandparents is like losing a part of your childhood. I’m so sorry for your loss.
Karen says
That’s what it feels like, even though I didn’t know her very well. Thank you for this note, Sugarenia.
Dominique says
So sorry Karen. May she rest in peace, our grand-mothers mean so much to us.
Karen says
Thank you, Dominique.
LauraA says
My condolences, Karen. Your grandmother looks and sounds like a neat lady, and it’s great that there is a form of heritage in terms of fashion and beauty skills and interest that you’re carrying with you–even though the opportunity for an in-depth relationship wasn’t there. It’s both surreal and yet very, very present. The trip you took in 2000 sounds like a wonderful time.
Be well, and we’re all pulling for you.
Karen says
Thank you, Laura. This was a very thoughtful and sweet thing to say. Hugs to you.
Judy says
Karen,
So sorry to hear about your grandma. You’ll be in my thoughts today. I hope she’s at peace.
Hugs!
Karen says
I hope she is too. Thank you, Judy. Sending you good thoughts back in return…
Verena says
Oh Karen,
So sorry to read that! I know how you feel, my beloved grandma died a month and two days ago… It’s so sad… Be sure to take a quiet moment (maybe together with your Mom) to think and talk about your grandma, that will help! Stay strong!!
Hugs!!
Karen says
Sorry for your loss, Verena. Were you and your grandma close?
Verena says
Hey, yes, we were very close but she was very ill in her last months so we had time to prepare…
My thoughts are with you and your mom, all the best for you!
Nadege says
I will keep you and your family in my prayers! Sorry to hear about your grandmother, Karen. It’s very difficult when your grandmother lives in another country and you can’t see her all the time. I’ve been there.
Your mother is beautiful, Karen. Even with the shades, I see the resemblence!
Karen says
Hi Nadege,
Thank you for the prayers. You’re very sweet and kind!
BeccaTheCyborg says
I’m sorry for your loss, she sounds pretty amazing, as does the rest of your family. *sends hugs*
Karen says
Sending you hugs back, Becca.
Katherine G says
Sorry to hear about your grandmother. I lost all 4 of my grandparents fairly young, and I still miss them. I wish at times they could see where I am today and what I am doing, and I wish my fiance could meet them because I have gotten to meet one set of his grandparents.
Your grandmother is a beautiful lady and you look a lot like her. Your mother is a beautiful lady, too, and I am sure she has a lot of support as she grieves for her mother. As for the fact that those of us in our 20’s and 30’s are getting older (and so are our parents), I try not to think about whenever they could pass and enjoy the time I get to spend with them. In my job, I’ve learned that anyone could go at any time because of disease, accidents, and trauma. Hugs to you and your family and cherish all the good memories and make new memories!
Karen says
Hi Katherine,
You know, I never felt like a full-fledged adult until my best friend lost her dad a few years back. Things change so much in your 20s and 30s. You’re so right about cherishing all the good times and making new memories. 🙂
Amy says
I’m so sorry to hear about your grandmother, but it sounds like she led a really full, wonderful life 🙂 And gosh darn, she looked like one classy lady! I hope you and your mom are hanging in there okay, and that Tabs is offering some cuddles.
Karen says
Hi Amy,
Tabs is actually being really sweet today. I think he knows mommy needs extra love.
Enjoy the rest of your day, and thank you for your comment.
Susan says
I’m so sorry about the loss of your grandmother. She has to have been as beautiful on the inside as on the outside to raise such a lovely woman in your mother, and in turn, your mother raising a lovely woman such as yourself. Many hugs and prayers to you and your family…I’m glad your mother got to be with her for a while before she passed. It’s so hard to start losing family members as we get older. I lost my grandparents early on, and my dad 12 years ago. It still feels so strange and I wish they were here to enjoy my husband and stepsons with me, as they never got to meet. Take care of yourself and know you are in my thoughts…
Karen says
Susan, thank you for this note. You’re very kind. 🙂
Karen S. says
Dear Karen,
You probably made your wonderful grandma so happy when you visited her! She was able to brag about her beautiful grand daughter and how much you two looked alike. My prayers are with you and your family. I hope that you feel better soon.
Karen says
This was so sweet, Karen. Thank you.
Heather says
Oh Karen I’m so sorry for the loss of your grandmother. I’m glad you have the memories that you do.
Karen says
Thank you for this, Heather. XO
Brian McD aka Roulette says
*hugs*
Sorry to hear about your loss, hon. I hope the support Tabs and El Hubs and your MBB crew online give you enough support to get through it. Now I know why you are soooo fashionable!!!
–Brian
Karen says
Big hugs back, Brian. You know you and I have a standing coffee date next time you make it out to SF.
Inaya says
Sorry to hear about your loss Karen. At least you have one vivid and great memory of your grandmother, you brighten my day and I hope someone does e same for you today and all other days to come
Karen says
You brighten my days with your comments, Inaya. Thank you for always being there!
Rads says
Am so sorry about your loss, Karen :hugs: :hugs:
Karen says
Hugs back, Rads.
TrippyPixie says
My sympathies for your loss. It’s never easy to lose a loved one.
Rita says
Sorry to hear about your grandmother, Karen.
Sunny @ Mostly Sunny says
Aww Karen I’m so sorry for your loss 🙁 Your gran must have been happy to have your mom around, and I hope this offers you some peace.
Tina B says
I am so sorry to read that you lost your gran! You are keeping all of those wonderful memories alive and well with those beautiful photos and stories :). Stay strong, I know that isn’t always easy.
S says
I’m so sorry. She was obviously a wonderful woman. Much love to you and your mom.
Rosemary says
I’m so sorry for your loss Karen. I offer you my condolences. I just lost my grandfather unexpectedly last week and I know exactly how you feel.
Nadine says
I’m so sorry, Karen. Grandma’s are such special people in our lives. Sending lots of hugs and good thoughts your way
Lulle says
I’m so sorry… Both my grandmas have been gone for a long time, but I remember the pain when they passed away 🙁
It seems like you and your granny had a lot in common, although you never had a chance to really get to know each other, and I’m sure she was very proud of you!
Michelle H says
My parents are from Ilocos, and their town is an hour south of Baguio City. My grandparents lived in the States for a long time but returned home to where my mother grew up in the Philippines. The distance was so hard. When my Lola died….I felt the same as you about how you feel for your mom. It didn’t hit me until I saw my mother grieve. Love and blessings to you & your family, Karen.
Iris says
I’m very sorry for your loss. Your grandmother sounded like a lovely, wonderful woman. My thoughts are with you and your family.
Kristen says
Karen,
I don’t comment a lot on your blog posts, but I lurk and read. I wanted to drop in to tell you I am so sorry for your loss, as well as your mother’s. The thought of losing my mother (and my father), despite all the arguments and fights we’ve had over the years, makes my heart ache and tears swell in my eyes.
Know this though: Even though we lose someone’s presence, they’re never truly gone. Their bodies may break down but the very essence that held them together is still here — still with us. The energy that powered their spirit is still with us, as energy cannot be destroyed once it has been created — it can only be converted into something else. So even if we lose someone, they’re still here with us. Their atoms are just less orderly.
*Hugs*
Keep on kicking.
-K
Pat says
My heart goes out to you after reading your post… wishing you and your family well at this difficult time. Hopefully you and Mom can get together soon, and share some good memories!
Kaye says
Hi Karen!
I’m a regular reader, but don’t usually have time to comment. I’m so sorry for the loss of your grandmother. I will pray for you and your family, I can only imagine how you must feel. My Mothers family is from the Phillipines as well, and I can completely relate when you talk of your own grand mother 🙂 They are strong, yet very humble women. How lucky you are to have your Mom living so close! Cherish those moments!
Lots of good thoughts and hugs for you.
Vanessa says
What a wonderful post in remembrance of your grandmother. Besides your different lives, I wonder how similar you and her really were.
Take care, Karen, everyone wishes you well.
Chamayne Rhodes says
Oh Karen…so sorry for your loss.
steph b says
So sorry to hear about your grandmother and that you can’t give your mom a big hug. My grandfather turned 98 yesterday and I can’t believe how fortunate I am to still have a grandparent in my life at my age.
Carol says
Oh Karen, I am so sorry! Hugs for you, and your mom. What a lovely tribute to your grandma. She was an absolute beauty(so are you, and your mom)! I bet your mom could answer some of the questions you have about your grandma. I am glad your mom was there. Please know you are in my thoughts, heart, and prayers. Hugs again, sweetie.
TJ says
I’m so sorry for your loss. She was really beautiful.
Annemarie says
Karen,
It’s as if I am writing what you are feeling and saying. I am so sorry for the loss of your Grandmother.
Your Grandmother was a beauty and I see the family resemblance.
Treasure the time with your Mom. I lost my Mom 12 years ago and I miss her and think of her very single day.
My thoughts and prayers are with you. Something tells me Tabs is feeling this and right at your side to help you thru this.
XOXO
Anne Marie
Julia Alkaseltzer says
Hi Karen. I’m so sorry about your Grandma. My condolences to you, your mom, and your family. Your grandma was so glamorous!
By the way, I really love your coconut juice story. And the chickens! Last time I was in the Philippines visiting my family, I remember chasing the chickens around. I love the Philippines. 🙂
Paris B says
I’m sorry to hear of your and your family’s loss, Karen. Its great that you met her and have good memories to treasure.
Savannah says
I’m so sorry for your loss, and I understand how you feel. You feel frustrated, if it wasn’t for such a huge distance you would’ve gotten to know her the way you wanted. That’s how it is with me and my baba. Your grandma was definitely a beautiful lady, inside and out. I’m sure she’d want to see you celebrating her life!
Alissa Cady says
Awww Karen, I am so very sorry for your loss. I was raised by my maternal Grandmother but lost my Mom seven years ago. I will be praying that your family heals and let’s this loss turn into something positive. You sound like you’re quite a bit like her! Both into fashion and makeup and both kind, strong women that people admire. 🙂
Chelsea says
I’m so sorry about your Grandma, Karen. She was a beautiful woman, and seemed like a strong, creative lady
Agata says
Karen, I am really sorry for your and your mom’s loss. You’re in my thoughts!
Maya says
I’m sorry for you loss! Hugs!
Fannie says
Aw Karen….I’m sorry to hear about your family loss. I hope you are comforted and kept in peace during this trying time. I often shudder at the thought of being without my mother someday, and I can’t imagine how hard it must be. I hope your mom gets some good time with the fam in the Philippines and restores her spirit. Much love, girlfran. XOXO!
musical says
My condolences, Karen! My respects to your Grandma. May she rest in peace. My thoughts are with you and your Mom through this tough time.
Big hugs to you, and lots of love your way!
Windie says
Wishing you well as you live out the legacy you have inherited from your grandmother. Whether or not you knew her very well, your mom, you and your family are a dream come true, one of many proofs in a life well lived.
Becca @ The Beauty Sample says
So sorry about your grandma Karen–she was a real beauty
saby says
Oh Karen you made me cry ! It is hard always losing someone you care about
HélèneSud says
It’s very sad for you and more for your Mum !
My grand’ma died 5 years ago and I missed her each day (I lived with my grandparents for many years )
all my best thoughts for you
bisbee says
Karen – I’m very sorry you lost your grandmother. It’s very difficult – my daughter-in-law’s father passed away last week – she lost her mother almost 6 years ago. They were both too young, and I’m very sorry my DIL had to lose both of her parents at her age (she’s almost 35) when she has young children (7 and 4). I was older (in my early and mid 40s) when I lost my parents, but my children were teenagers, so they understood and will remember their grandparents.
It’s never easy to lose loved ones. When you parents come home, try to spend some time with your mother, and ask her to talk about her memories of her mother. It will be healing for both of you!
Kiss & Make-up says
Sorry for your loss, Karen 🙁 Those are beautiful pictures.
jenn s. says
I’m so sorry to hear of your dear grandmother’s passing, Karen. She was a very beautiful lady, indeed. I understand missing your Mom, with her being so far away from you right now. I lost my sweet Mom less than a month ago very unexpectedly and suddenly. She was far too young and I miss her terribly. Hug your Mom tight for me upon her return to the States. 🙂
Barbara says
So sorry for your loss. I thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. {{{hugs}}}
Amber says
Karen, my condolences on your grandma. Your touching tribute reminded me of own glam grandma. Wish we could have known them way back when!
Lenita says
hugs to you, karen.
which province is your grandma from, not the laguna area? i go to the phils about 2-3 times a year for work, always love it there. pinoys are such friendly and fun-loving people!
i’m grateful to have known both my grandmothers. although we lived a distance, we got to visit and see each other perhaps every other year. they are so different, yet so alike. i get my no-nonsense and fearless stance from them. they have both passed away, but their heritage stays on.
Eugenia says
Karen, I just wanted to extend my deepest and most heart-felt condolences to you and your family, especially your mom. I was fortunate enough to be able to have my grandmother near me since before I was born and I’m grateful that we got to know each other well, but there’s always so much more you never think to ask about – the little things that make up a person’s life. Take comfort from the fact that no matter what, you will always carry a small part of her inside you and be proud of the legacy she left you: a love of beauty! May she rest in peace.
Audrey says
Karen, I am so sorry for your loss. You’re family is in my thoughts and prayers! It’s always sad when someone passes away and you realize that you wish you could’ve known them better. I felt the same way about my great-grandmother. She passed away when I was 10 (she was 93!), but she lived in Kentucky while I live in Iowa, so I didn’t see her very often. I wish I could’ve asked her more about her life as the child of two German immigrants during WW2 and through the 20th century.
Viri says
Im so sorry for your grandmas passing 🙁 I really feel like I can connect to your story as your situation is similar to mine, except my family is from Mexico. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family
Alexandra says
Im sorry to hear about your grandmother. All my grandparents are gone. My dad’s dad died in 73 so i never met him as i wasnt born till 75. Then my dad’s mother lived at the other end of the coutntry and wasnt really involved in our life in a big way. My mums parents who we called nana and papa have been gone a while now, nana 5 years and papa 4 years. I miss them both so much, and im glad that i had my son young,so they got to know him and vice versa. I know my son gave them alot of joy. Losing your loved ones makes you cherish the time you have left with your remaining relatives.