TABS: Woman. Woooo-man. WOMAN!
KAREN: Um, yes, Tabs?
TABS: I need you to stop whatever you’re doing because I have an urgent task for you.
KAREN: Well, I’m in the middle of alphabetizing your cans of gravy right now, which earlier today you called the “highest priority” in the office, and if I stop now to do something else, I’ll be here all night long.
KAREN: [Sigh] What is it?
TABS: Listen, Iâ€™m gonna need you to try on these two new pieces from the MAC Carine Roitfeld collection — the Full Face Kit in Jungle Camouflage and the Lipstick in Tropical Mist.
KAREN: Sure, but does it have to be now? Can’t it wait ’til tomorrow?
TABS: Oh, I’m sorry. Did the terms of your employment suddenly change? — because I don’t remember paying you to ask questions.
KAREN: It’s funny you should mention that, because I don’t remember you paying me at all.
TABS: Well excuuuuuse me, miss thing! If you don’t want the job, I can get someone else. I know at least 50 girls who would jump at the chance to assist me.
KAREN: Okay, okay. Don’t get your tail in a knot. Is there a particular look you want me to try?
TABS: That’s better. Yes, how about something smokey? You know I lurves me some smokey eyes.
MAC teamed up with Carine Roitfeld, former Vogue Paris editor-in-chief, fashion model and writer, to create the MAC Carine Roitfeld Collection, a 20-piece release that plants the focus firmly on eyes and brows for a look that reflects Carineâ€™s signature smokey eyes, bold brows and nude lips. You can find it now at North American MAC counters, stores and maccosmetics.com. Coming to international locales next month.
KAREN: [about 20 minutes later] Well, what do ya think?
TABS: Hmm… Acceptable. I deem you worthy of me not scratching you.
KAREN: Um, okay? Thank you. I think.
TABS: Tell me, what did you think of the products?
KAREN: Well, the shadows in the Full Face Kit are really easy to blend. No fallout either. And the Cremeblend Blush looks very natural.
TABS: Go on…
KAREN: The Lipstick, though? Eh. Cute packaging, but it’s super sheer. Almost too sheer, like I’m not wearing anything at all… It might as well be a lip balm.
TABS: Interesting. Thank you for your report. I’ll take it under advisement while preparing my holiday gift list.
Oh! — look at the time. I’m expecting a Skype call from Choupette Lagerfeld any minute. Please shut the door on your way out.
KAREN: Sure thing, boss.
The Kitty Song
Cat ladies, this song’s for you!
No, seriously. It’s an awesome tune called Kitty Song, and it was written and recorded by MBB reader Shannon (how cool is that?!). Give it a listen (or 10 or 12!). It’s sure to bring a smile to your face.
Tabs likes to think that he inspired the references to tempting tummies…
Your friendly neighborhood beauty addict,