My voice is kinda gravelly this morning. It sounds like I spent the whole night eating Fruity Pebbles without any milk, and a big reason is because I spent part of last night locked in my bathroom yelling into a folded towel.
I know that sounds completely insane! — but hear me out. There was a method to my madness.
I had kind of a bad day yesterday. The morning started off fine, it was cool, lunch was fine, and then somewhere around 1 or 2, things just went off the rails. First, I realized that I accidentally deleted a bunch of pics that I took. Second, I dunno, sometimes I just have really bad writing days. As with anything, some days it’s easy, and some days it’s hard. And yesterday it was hard.
By the end of the day, I was already in tears, but then I read kind of a nasty comment from a stranger criticizing pretty much my entire outlook on blogging, and how I exhibit “too much personality” (seriously?).
That pushed me over the edge… I lost my sh*t and started thinking of prison fights and the word, “shank,” as in, “to shank someone.”
LOL! I’m obviously not really going to shank anyone, but I’m just sayin’ — the word occurred to me.
I’d come unhinged, but I didn’t want to worry El Hub or cry the night away. I just needed a way to vent my feelings.
So, I grabbed my stopwatch, set it for 10 minutes, locked myself in the bathroom and told myself that I could blow my top! — and at the end of the 10 minutes, I would let it go, put it behind me, stop crying, and move on.
In the bathroom, I folded a towel, buried my face in it and cried and yelled and cursed!!
It was very much like that scene from Footloose when Kevin Bacon/Ren is doing gymnastics in the barn and roaring at the universe (“You don’t know me!!”), except much less cardiovascular.
And you know what? It worked. The funny thing is, I yelled myself out after 5 minutes. I didn’t even yell the full 10. I guess just giving myself permission to fall apart went a long way toward helping me feel better.
And if yelling into a towel doesn’t sound like your thing, you could always try writing your feelings down, typing them into a computer, dictating them into your iPhone or voice recorder, and then tearing them up or deleting the files. For me, I think it does help to get rid of it, though, whatever it is, and let it go.
I think we’re always trying to keep our composure in front of our friends and family, you know? Be strong for everyone else. But it sure can be a relief to just go apesh*t from time to time. LOL!
Anywho, just one of the little coping mechanisms I use sometimes and wanted to share. Hope things are going well on your end of the keyboard. Talk to you soon.
Your friendly neighborhood beauty addict,