Once upon a time there lived a very sleepy girl named Karen. Early one Sunday morning, her tabby alarm clock signaled that it was time to wake up, but, as I just mentioned, she was a very sleepy girl.
“No…” she groaned at the purr-chirping tabby alarm clock. “Need more sleep.”
But the tabby alarm clock was an uncompromising device, a simple machine that operated on gravy and lurvies, and its reserves of both were dangerously low.
The tabby alarm clock triggered its low-power alert. “Mrrrrrowww…”
Wha!? Karen opened an eye that lolled about sleepily, trying to find the source of the annoying sound. It slowly came into focus on an object about one foot –
Karen jerked awake with a start. The noise was much louder this time.
“Tabs!” she called at the tabby alarm clock. “Let me sleep.” And she plopped back down on her pillow.
Silence. She must have triggered the Snooze, so she drifted back to sleep…
The tabby alarm clock processed this data through its central processing unit, which outputted a single word in reply: unacceptable. It surveyed the situation, analyzed the bed-based terrain, and determined the next most logical course of action: physical intervention.
And then it leapt.
Bringing the full force of its 18-pound low-hanging belly to bear on the human’s head, the tabby alarm clock landed with the force of an…18-pound tabby.
“Mrmph!” came the muffled cry as Karen’s hands flew to her face. Her mouth was filled with something. What? It was moving! Alive! What…?
She realized what had happend. “Tabs!”
With its mission accomplished, the tabby alarm clock hopped out of the human’s reach.
“Tabs,” Karen growled, “you need to learn how to use the can opener, because that was not cool.”
Cool. The tabby alarm clock thought it recognized that word. Cool. Yes, very cool.
A few beauty posts that caught my eye…
- Julep Nail Vernis Gayle: When Eggplant Meets Creme — à la peach
- Coconut Oil: Health and Hair Benefits — My Weekend Ramblings
- The Best Teeth Whitener You’ve Never Heard Of! — Beauty Logic
- Guppy Sanding Fruit Extract Nail Polish in #12 — Nihrida
- How to Get a Wet-Finish, Faux-Gloss Lid (aka Glossy Smokey Eyes) — theNotice
- Project Runway: Season 9 Winner Anya Ayoung-Chee on Winning the Fan Favorite Contest — Afrobella
- Learn a Gorgeous, Glowy Holiday Makeup Look — BellaSugar
- Wet n Wild Limited Edition ColorIcon Ice Baby Nail Color Collection Swatches — Lacquered, Painted, Polished
- Fashion Inspiration: The Powerpuff Girls — College Fashion
- How to Highlight Your Facial Features — JennySue Makeup
- Urban Decay Midnight Emergency Kit: It’s the Glitter Bomb.com — Lipglossiping
The Weekly Roundup: MBB Posts You Might Have Missed
MY LAST-MINUTE MAC HALLOWEEN COSTUME,
AND BEWARE THE SHARK CAT!
Shoot, I wasn’t even planning to dress up at all this year, but Tabs insisted that I throw something on, because he didn’t want to be the only kitty on the block without a dressed up assistant/trick-or-treating companion.
I couldn’t bear the thought of hitting up the costume store, since I knew it was gonna be crazy busy, so I busted a Tim Gunn and tried to “make it work” with what I had around the house.
As far as last-minute Halloween getups go, this MAC artist costume was super easy. I slipped on a black dress, fashioned a homemade tag out of a MAC logo I found online and stuck some brushes behind my ear. I also really, REALLY wanted to sling a black brush belt around my waist (like the ones that MAC artists wear at the counter), but I kinda ran out of time. I wore a gold brush belt from the MAC Wonder Woman collection instead. Read more…
GLAM HAS ALWAYS BEEN COOL, BUT BENEFIT TAKES IT A
STEP FURTHER WITH THEIR LATEST MAKEUP KIT FOR EYES, LIPS AND CHEEKS
The power of packaging compels you! The power of packaging compels you!
And for me with Benefit’s new “I’m Glam… Therefore I am” palette ($36), it almost does. I desperately wanted to bond with B’s new kit of mostly cool-toned colors for eyes, lips and cheeks. That way I’d feel good about giving it a permanent place on my dresser, a place where I could gaze lovingly at the adorable illustrated box.
The glam gal featured on the front reminds me of the girls my friends and I would doodle on our notebooks in school, complete with gown, tiara and opera-length gloves, and her step-by-step makeup lessons imprinted on the packaging describe how to use the palette to achieve two distinct looks, one called Daytime Dahling and the other, Evening Goddess. Read more…
A SMASHBOX HOLIDAY 2011 FACE OF THE DAY
WITH THE CLICK YOU’RE IT PALETTE
Because Smashbox bestowed numbers upon the pans of powder eyeshadow and cream liner in their new limited edition Click You’re It kit, following the included tutorial card for the “Golden Smolder” look this afternoon was a little like painting by numbers.
But not exactly. It was like a weird class combining math and art…and I’ve always kinda struggled with one of those disciplines, LOL!
I got a little carried away with the olive green eyeshadow, No. 15 in the palette, so my version of the look turned out more green than gold. I like the outcome, but it definitely didn’t go exactly as I’d planned. Read more…
YOU’RE DESTINED FOR FAME (AND FALLOUT)
WITH THE SMASHBOX BE DISCOVERED HOLIDAY PALETTE
I doubt Hollywood’s even looking for a short, sassy Filipino chick without any acting experience to star opposite Ryan Gosling in an upcoming romantic comedy, but if, perchance, I’m ever stopped by a famous director at Petco and asked to play the wind beneath Ryan’s wings, you can bet I’m putting down those 20 cans of gravy, girl, because we’re going to Hollywood!
Logic places the chances of this happening somewhere below 0.000001%, but ya never know… Maybe the new limited edition Smashbox Be Discovered palette (about $60, from the new Snappy Holidays 2011 collection) will improve my odds. Read more…
THE TARTE LIP SERVICE LIMITED EDITION
LIPSURGENCE COLLECTION AND A SNICKERS-FUELED SUGAR HIGH
Believe it or not, this swatch session for the new Tarte Lip Service Limited-Edition LipSurgence Collection ($29) actually began as something somewhat normal. But then I had two of these tiny Snickers bars (because it’s physically impossible to have just one).
And then it sort of went downhill from there. Read more…
HAPPY NOSES MAKE FOR HAPPY HOLIDAYS WITH THE BENEFIT
CRESCENT ROW LIMITED EDITION SET
Benefit’s at it again this year, adding fragrant fuel to the fire that is my current obsession with petite perfume bottles, by taking us down another holiday trip down Crescent Row. Their new $36 Crescent Row Limited Edition Set bundles together four of the line’s 0.43-oz. (they’re small but cute) eau de toilettes.
Even though the four fragrances in this year’s set look and seem more to me like spring and summer scents than fragrances for winter and fall, I still like them all. Fragrance is a very personal thing, of course, and opinions will vary, but these four last all day long on my skin and remain pleasant as the notes evolve. Read more…
MISS PIGGY FOR MAC COLLECTION
SWATCHES AND PICS
When I was four, my favorite thing on television was The Muppet Show. I remember sitting in front of our set and praying I wouldn’t have to get up to fix the bunny ears on top of the TV, because I didn’t want to miss a single second.
I especially loved the two old dudes in the balcony who made fun of everyone, the adorable Fozzy bear, the Swedish Chef (“Bork! Bork! Bork!”) and of course, the diva of all divas, Miss Piggy.
How could you not love a glamorous pig in high heels, pearls and opera-length gloves? Read more…
TAKE OUT YOUR DANCING SHOES FOR THE TARTE
THE STARLET LIMITED-EDITION MAKEUP VANITY
My neighbors probably don’t need another reason to think I’ve completely lost my mind, but that didn’t stop me from giving them another one today.
Since they already know that I take my cat out for walks on a leash, snap pictures of myself in the front yard, drive to the grocery store wearing false eyelashes, and periodically leap like this in the street, I figured heck — I have nothing else to lose. Might as well take pics of myself dancing in front of the windows while I blast Footloose and try on Tarte’s new The Starlet Limited-Edition Makeup Vanity ($52). Read more…
Your friendly neighborhood beauty addict,