Makeup & Beauty Blog

Urban Decay Perversion False Lashes in Trap

If you think you’re going to wear Urban Decay’s new Perversion Lashes in Trap ($15) to Target to buy cat food without having people really, really stare at you, you are mistaken. Because these lashes look completely cra-zay-zy in real life.

I mean, they look great in pics! They’re definitely dramatic…which makes sense; that is what the new Perversion Lash line is all about.

If you’re going out clubbing or have a big night on the town or if you just landed that job as a full-time dominatrix (*cracks whip), then yeah. Awesome lashes.

But for, like, real life kind of stuff, nuh-uh. I look downright insane with these on, like I should be hanging out with Britney when she shaved her head, and attacking cars with an umbrella.

Trap is one of three new $15 Perversion Lash styles, all permanent members of the UD line.

It’s weird… Whenever I wear Trap and post pics, I usually get some nice comments, and I think it’s because of the length of the lashes, especially the bundles around the center.

I think they make my eyes look wider, like that doe-eyed thing to the Nth degree, which I like. Too bad they’re about as comfortable as a pair of six-inch pointy high heels a half size too small.

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Wearing the new $60 Dolce & Gabbana’s new Smooth Eye Colour Quad in Tangier and dreaming about corn…

Mashed potatoes, gravy, biscuits, buttered corn…

CORN! Mmm, corn.

I’m trying to get a grip on myself, but my body is acting of its own accord (*tummy rumbles*). Every time I open the new Dolce & Gabbana Smooth Eye Color Quad in Tangier, I immediately think “Happy Thanksgiving!”

The Dolce Gabbana Smooth Eye Colour Quad in Tangier

It’s not my fault. It’s the orange, man. Seeing it there next to that brown and gold, and I momentarily forget that it’s not fall. I feel like busting out my boots with the fur (with the fur) and jumping into a pile of autumn leaves.

Funny thing is, it’s not a fall quad. Tangier is one of two limited edition quads in the new Dolce & Gabbana Summer Glow collection, available now at counters and online.

With its rich amber and gold, it’s perfect for sexy screen siren looks, whether now in the summer, or later in the fall.

Sixty bones is a lot for an eyeshadow quad, but at least this one is remarkably easy to use. I’ve been wearing it for the past few days, and I’m surprised. I can’t believe how easy it’s been to incorporate into casual and dressy looks — even that cray-cray matte orange.

For these first pics I tried to think outside the box, so I’m wearing it in the crease with a hazy orange smokey eye.

Only semi-cray.

But I’ve also used the quad in more causal ways. Like, the other day I buffed the light peach, which has just the perfect amount of sheen so it isn’t too shimmery, from my lash line up to my brow bone, blended the matte brown into the crease, and then lightly dusted the shimmery gold in the inner corners, before finishing with a bit of black liner and mascara.

A casual daytime look! Lips are MAC Impassioned Lipstick and cheeks are Chanel Malice

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My friend Cindy is staunchly anti-beauty, and it’s rare when she wants to talk about makeup or beauty products, so this snippet of a thrilling conversation we recently had was a pleasant surprise.

CINDY: Do you use body lotion every day?

ME: Well, yeah. Don’t you?

CINDY: Uh uh. I don’t need to. I don’t really have dry skin.

ME: Lucky you!

CINDY: Do you have to use it everywhere? Even on your feet?

ME: Oh, yeah. Especially my feet.

CINDY: What happens if you miss a day?

ME: My skin starts to look like crusty parmesan cheese.

Yeah, it’s not a good look, which is why I’m big into body lotions. Here are the ones currently living on my bathroom shelf…

Ahava Mineral Body Lotion Duo ($37.50 for a 17-oz bottle): One for me, one for my mama! And these bottles are huge.

First, Ahava Mineral Body Lotion is hella moisturizing yet doesn’t leave a greasy residue behind. It comes as a two-pack available now exclusively at Nordstrom for $37.50 ($96 value), and the light powdery scent doesn’t overwhelm my perfume.

Antica Farmacista Peonia, Gardenia & Rosa Body Moisturizer ($25 for a 10-oz. bottle): Rose dominates this moisturizer’s memorable scent, and the fragrance lingers all day long and layers well with my rosy perfumes.

The moisturizing formula is a touch greasier than the Ahava lotion I mentioned earlier, but it contains many moisturizing ingredients that sit well with my alligator skin, like aloe vera, sweet almond oil and shea butter, to name a few.

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Oh, Rain Dove, my eyeshadow love, you make my heart flutter.

When I see your golden taupe shimmering in the inner corners of my eyes, my obsession with Rouge Bunny Rouge shadows soars to new heights.

I will sing songs of your light, feathery formula and your subtle flash of rose gold, and how it evokes memories of a fleeting visit from a hummingbird…

Rouge Bunny Rouge When Birds are Singing Long-lasting Eye Shadow in Rain Dove ($25) is nesting now on Rouge Bunny Rouge counters and online.

Oui, ma cherie, I could spend all day looking at the NYX 5-Piece La Fleur Lip Gloss Set.

These pinks and peaches are the exact same versions of those shades that I always like to have with me in purse. They’re my perfect everyday colors.

This $15 kit is like a slightly understated, more neutral version of NYX’s The Legends Lip Set, and the two kits have a few things in common. The La Fleur lipglosses also have that same Sour Patch candy taste and scent (The sweet part, like how they taste at first. Not the sour part.) that lasts about two hours on me, and they also apply pretty sheer.

Only thing is…I can’t easily tell them apart on my pigmented pout, so I’ll use them more for layering to tone down bright pink, peach and coral lip products than as standalone glosses.

The $15 La Fleur Lip Gloss set is available now online and wherever NYX is sold.

From the left: Cashmere, Fair Lady, Natural Beauty, Tickle Me Pink and Made You Blush

From the left: Cashmere, Fair Lady, Natural Beauty, Tickle Me Pink and Made You Blush